Written by: Tracy Renee Stafford, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
This time of year is meant to be joyous, a time for sharing gratitude in the happy company of our dear ones. Sadly however, the more dominant energy floating through the air is often stress, & not holiday spirit. Time, money, energy, patience - it can all seem to be in short supply as we struggle to fit everything in. But what if there was a way to feel like we did have enough? What if the season of giving was stress-free, win-win, & energising?
We can make this holiday time a delightful experience of effortless generosity & uncomplicated joyfulness, simply by tapping into the natural abundance that is already within & around us.
The Abundance Mindset
Abundance is a code word for ‘richness’ or ‘wealth’. While it can refer to financial wealth, more often abundance refers to:
all of the blessings that we have been given (good health, friends, family)
the experiences that have allowed us to grow (even the adverse ones)
the qualities that have made us more resilient (grit, positive energy, a robust sense of humour)
Even if we don’t possess any of the above, with an ‘abundance mindset’ we still feel as though we have all the resources we need in order to be happy, to thrive, & to share. Gratitude, even for the ‘small things’ (a beautiful sunrise, a warm smile, the perfect parking spot) arises naturally. Instead of worrying about the unknown future, feeling abundant, we trust in our capacity to navigate our way through the mystery.
The Scarcity Mindset
In contrast, someone with a ‘scarcity mindset’ feels as though they don’t have enough & that their very survival is in jeopardy. This incites the need to:
hoard or protect the precious resources that they have
be cautious with decision-making
think small & self-impose limitations
When abundance does come, the tendency is to spend it all quickly, for fear that any gains made are ephemeral & fleeting.
These beliefs are not just related to money, mind you. A scarcity mindset can also exist around love, success, intelligence, health, time, & energy.
Families, communities, & whole societies may have adopted this mindset out of a perceived necessity, but perpetuating the feeling of lack – of never enough – limits our potential & blinds us to the richness & blessings that are inside & all around us. As Buddhist teacher Pema Chödrön says, when we’re stuck in scarcity, “It’s like standing in a vast field of wildflowers with a black hood over our heads. It’s like coming upon a tree of singing birds while wearing earplugs”.
Wealth is clearly not distributed equally throughout our world, but the keyword that we can focus on in order to transform our own perspective, and ultimately, our situation, is ‘mindset’.
Shifting our focus to what we do have, instead of what we don’t, is the key to untethering a natural generosity that’s infused with joy & gratitude. Ironically, it’s also the key to becoming more abundant. By taking very gradual & realistic steps we can transform from feeling like a dry well to an overflowing river.
Moving from Scarcity to Abundance
1. Make your abundance list
As I said above, it all starts by focusing on what we already have. While it might not be an unlimited bank account, we can look towards some of the things that I already mentioned, such as good health, family & friends – our most priceless treasures. We can look towards the skills, strengths, & abilities that can be a source of great personal satisfaction & that can also be of immense benefit to others. We can look towards our passions. Abundance can be discovered by noticing what we give away already without feeling like we’re losing something. I am abundantly passionate about cooking. When I share my creations with others it feels like I get more than I give. Looking to where you also feel this is key to discovering your inherent wealth.
Finally, we can look towards all the blessings, big & small, that we are given each day – a beautiful sky, a warm bed, enough food. Noticing all these daily gifts is where we find joy, and sharing this joy with others is the way we find abundance.
Make a list of all of the things you feel abundant in. Maybe you have an abundant sense of humour that you love to share with others. Maybe you have an exceptional skill for focusing on one thing at a time until the job gets done. Be playful with your list, noticing all that you enjoy for yourself & that you naturally share with others without even realising it.
2. Gift your abundances
During this holiday season, consider making the items on this list your gifts to others. It is possible to become depleted during this busy time of year, especially when we’re giving away things that we feel less abundant in. A big part of the abundance mindset is making situations be for the mutual benefit of all, so that everyone feels a positive exchange of energy. When we enjoy the act of giving, when it feels easy & delightful, the receiver feels it, making the gift even more precious. You might share your favourite jokes, recipes, or music with others. The intention behind the gift is what makes it so valuable, not the money.
3. Make your ‘lacklist’
Make a list of the areas where you feel there’s a lack of abundance. I’m purposely using the word ‘feel’ because we all know someone who, in our opinion, has plenty of everything but they don’t seem to feel it themselves. Be honest & focus on where you’re feeling scarcity. Write it down. Let these be areas where you conserve your energy over this holiday season. Maybe you’re feeling an abundance of compassion, but a lack of time, and decide that instead of attending every holiday event you’re invited to, you send really thoughtful notes to the hosts, letting them know how much you care about them & appreciate the invite. These gestures of sincere consideration & affection can be very touching to receive. Maybe you’re feeling a lack of money, and so decide to give your dear ones the gift of your time, positive energy, & creativity, instead of stressing yourself out with overspending. This act of self-honouring gives permission for others to do the same, which is actually another great gift.
4. Fill up your own cup
Using this same ‘lacklist’, find ways that you can gift some of these things to yourself. If you’re feeling a lack of love, you could book yourself a massage or attend an online yoga retreat, creating your own lovenest from the comfort of your own home. If you’re feeling a lack of joy, you could make daily walks in nature your holiday practice. Honouring your personal situation with respect & kindness is important. In our culture, we’re often taught the competing & contradictory lessons that being independent is virtuous, but giving to ourselves is ‘selfish’. This contradiction doesn’t work. If we want to be able to rely on ourselves, we also need to be able to give to ourselves.
5. Practice giving what we can
Still looking at your lacklist, find small ways that you can gift some of these items to others. Again, if you are feeling a lack of love, you could make Loving Kindness Meditation a holiday season ritual. In this practice, you send love first to yourself, then to those dearest to you, then to strangers, & finally to all beings. Notice if you don’t feel your own love vibration radically increasing as you do this! If you’re feeling a lack of courage to try new things, find someone in your life, perhaps a young person, whose courage you can help to bolster. You might take them out on an adventure that they have been wanting to do but have been fearful to attempt alone. Helping others with their own issues of scarcity allows us to realise just how much of this resource we already have hiding within us. This is a beautiful holiday gift that is definitely win-win.
6. Begin a gratitude practice
First thing in the morning or last thing at night, you could take a moment to list at least 3 things that you are grateful for that day. It could be as simple as being grateful for being able to get out of bed, or drink clean water, or feel safe in your own home. When we start to notice all that we receive each day, our hearts & minds begin to change. We can start to feel profoundly abundant from the inside, no matter what our outer circumstances are.
These practices can be used out of the holiday season as well! With practice, we can change our relationship to our lacklist. Instead of worrying, feeling tight, & caught in the scarcity cycle of hoarding & splurging, we can see things from a bigger, more spacious perspective. Our energy becomes expansive, enthusiastic, optimistic & infused with gratitude. These are the real tools of creating abundance.
Finally, speaking as a recovering ‘scarcity mindsetter’ I can attest to the fact that we often deplete ourselves by giving away more than we need to because we don’t trust that our naturally abundant presence is more than enough. When we show up healthy, happy, & brimming with our own unique expression of aliveness, it’s generosity embodied.
Wishing everyone a safe & abundant holiday season. May you be surprised by the generosity within & around you.
Tracy Renee Stafford, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Tracy Renee Stafford is a coach in Fully Embodied Fitness — a weave of yoga, pilates, dance, & functional exercise - and in Fully Embodied Living based on 4 Pillars of Well-Being: Connection to Body, Nourishment, Presence & Growth. Her mission is to help people discover how they can make self-care a celebration, rather than an obligation, & enjoy the body for how it feels, rather than just for how it performs or looks. She ran her own studio in the Canadian Prairies heartland for 20 very rewarding years - where she taught various forms of fitness, with a specific interest in injury prevention & rehabilitation and empowering students with information on HOW the body works best. She is a Mindful Movement, Holistic Living & Nutrition Coach, weaving together all of her expertise into her Fully Embodied Living Programs. She currently lives in Buenos Aires and keeps her passion for dance alive by studying Argentine Tango.
