Written by: Jenn Drakes, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Ho Ho Ho, its holiday time! As we entered the month of December, I took a moment to reflect on many December journeys, and in doing so I was able to see so much difference in celebrations of the past and present day. My goal with this article is to take you down my merry memory lane and have you consider what is relatable, what is missed, what is treasured, and what differences lie in such a familiar time as what used to be openly referred to as Christmas.
There was a range of emotions in looking back at prior festive seasons and what were great family and extended family gatherings. You see, growing up, the holidays were absolutely amazing. It is my mother’s favourite time of the year, and she went all out with the festivities. At that time, many families came together – the Drakes, Fredericks, Fordes, and there were always what I affectionately called strays around our table. I especially adored the strays, because they always had interesting backgrounds and stories to share. I also came to appreciate the immigration impacts of separation from loved ones, at times their own children and facing new experiences trying to forge a new life and growth opportunities. Of course, given my own Mother’s journey, I could relate, and so we embraced these individuals to ensure they were not alone.
Christmas Eves were the start of excitement that would last for days. In addition to cooking prep and last minute store grabs, we headed out to a late evening church service. As the bus pulled up to the church stop, we could hear the church bells ringing out as the congregation arrived and assembled. I couldn’t wait to hear my favourite songs sang – Go Tell It on the Mountain, We Three Kings, Little Drummer Boy, Hark! the Herald Angels Sing, Joy to the World, Silent Night, Away in the Manger, O Little Town of Bethlehem, God Rest You Merry Gentlemen, O Come All Ye Faithful, Jingle Bells, Hallelujah, Deck the Halls, This Little Light of Mine, The First Noel, 12 Days of Christmas, and close to or at the end would be We Wish You a Merry Christmas. Take a moment to click a few of the links that appeal to you and enjoy the music. I am hoping it recalls your own memories of festive joy and cheer.
On Christmas Day, the house would be engulfed with the smell of home-cooked food and roasted nuts intermixed with the pine smell of the Christmas tree, which was always a real one, back then. That real tree had home-made decorations, some edible – say what?? Even as a child, on Christmas day I helped out with the coleslaw and the fruit punch. My mom did an appetizer that consisted of grapefruits with toothpicks holding cheese and cherries. I helped out with those as well – lovingly eating them as I went. I use to do this two for you and one for me thing, with someone affectionately tapping me to stop that as they passed. The kitchen was a flourish of activity as Aunts and Uncles moved around to extend the dining table, dress it up, plate it in holiday splendour, and pile it with dish after dish of absolutely amazing 100% home-cooked food. The children, siblings, cousins and friends had their own decorated table, their own gatherings, and their own conversations. Christmas music would always be playing in the background and at some point the tunes would change to a medley of dance songs and those present would indeed start dancing. As the day progressed into evening, one friend after another dropped in for drinks and deserts. Many holidays would see those traveling to our house facing harsh winter conditions that included snow storms, but even that deterred few from coming. Yes, our Christmases were bustling with family, friends, cooking, eating, drinking, and most importantly love. It was a day few could ruin.
Stepping back a moment, my mom never stopped us from believing in Santa Clause, but she also never really pushed it on us either. Despite there always being a gift under the tree from Santa, she kind of left us to figure it out for ourselves. We did the Santa photos, and we did the gift shopping.
We cannot speak of Christmas without spotlighting the shopping. Back then, it was privately owned boutiques and/or department store sprees. The visits saw us admiring the street decorations and storefront window decorations; which were elaborately themed. Each window told a different holiday story. As we roamed, we took in the songs of the sidewalk carolers, the bells from the Salvation Army elves strategically placed at entranceways into stores and commuter trains. It was a fully embracing sensory experience, for young children, and the adults enjoyed seeing the delight of the kids.
I was never a big fan of television, but my sister was, and leading up to Christmas Day we would more fully bond by spending time watching the holiday shows together – Frosty the Snowman, A Charlie Brown Christmas, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, Twas the Night Before Christmas, Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town, It’s a Wonderful Life, the Grinch Who Stole Christmas, Miracle On 34th Street, A Christmas Carol, and some others that included special holiday shows. On Christmas day is when we watched the Sound of Music. Again, click on some links to be reminded of the popular shows of that time.
Now fast forward to present day, and yes, so much has changed from my perspective. The Aunts and Uncles I spoke about aged, and some passed away. As populations migrated into suburban areas to leverage better real estate prices, young folks moved away for better work opportunities, families ended up dispersed and fragmented into widely spread locales. It resulted in Christmas celebrations being tapered down to intimate gatherings of what Oola calls inner circle members. I, for one, moved away from the commercialization of the holiday; especially so once the children and cousins reached certain ages. The real tree became a collapsible fake one. When we took on domesticated pets, even the collapsible tree no longer came out.
For the children that followed behind me, I definitely encouraged the belief in Santa. In fact, I went all out ensuring their imaginations were stimulated through letter writing, leaving footsteps in the snow, storytelling, and midnight cookies and milk refreshments for the man himself. One holiday I left Santa’s gift bag by the eaten cookies and awoke to the squeals of concerned children for the forgotten item. I wrote to Santa letting him know where the lost item could be found, and the next year we left it for him, and voila it was gone when the children awoke. A thank you letter from Santa was in its place. Great memories were created, or so I hope, and so I am told by the kids who had the experiences. I am thankful my children got to experience some larger family gatherings before they altogether stopped, but they were never like my time as a child. The street decorations are less, the mall and department store activities are less, the food is less, the gift giving is less. What remains is the willingness to come together, prepare good food that represents favourites of everyone present with a few new dishes thrown in, and celebrate the love we have for each other. We catch up, we reach out by phone to those missing from the table, and we send out the current year in style.
I would be lying if I said I did not miss the larger gatherings, but I accept that those are days gone by and I hold their memories as priceless treasures. What I will never miss is the exhaustion of my Mom preparing and hosting the feast, the massive cleanup, the set-up and taking down of decorations, the gift wrapping and cleanup of all the paper once the gifts were opened. Nor do I miss the eventual discarding of gifts no longer holding the interest of their recipients. I really do appreciate the simpler and smaller aspect of life. I love the passing of the baton from my Mom to me, and me to my mine in helping to prepare the meals and serve those so well-deserving of being served. What memories do you hold dear? What changes have you seen unfold?
In the spirit of my Merry Christmas past, I wish all of you a spectacular holiday season, in whatever way you choose to spend the time. I hope everyone finds a safe and welcoming place to gather, eat and be merry, and I hope your table embraces others who may otherwise spend the time alone.
Jenn Drakes is one of THE ACCELERATORS, a team of business-savvy coaches who work with SMBs to propel them forward. In addition to reading this article, take in one of the Employ to Innovate shows for insights on a number of relevant topics or schedule a call to discuss your growth needs.
Jenn Drakes, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Jenn is a mom, serial entrepreneur, and life advocate who hosts the podcast Arrays of Living. She is also the creator and co-host of the Get Awesome Show, author of the book Aladdin Carpets – Change your Perspective, Change your Life.
In addition to Brainz Magazine, she is also a Featured Author on Plumose.co for her poetry and stories and Contributing Author on Boss Ladies Mindset.
Jenn is a hidden gem in a desert of gems, and everyone who discovers her is forever changed by her personality and presence. Over the years of working with youths and young adults, she was crowned The Original Goddess to acknowledge the shared feeling that "Jenn is wise beyond her years. I find her to be almost an "old soul" type of spirit." Her voice and writings are powerful, impactful, and life-changing because they trigger thought and promote tantalizing, intelligent conversations.
Today, she uses that wisdom to shatter glass ceilings and power up the purpose she believes everyone holds within. A belief that is foundationally based on all of us being born with a gift and a responsibility to use and share that gift to achieve sustainable happiness. Her mission is to improve how people feel about themselves and empower their sense of self-worth to achieve more personally and professionally than they imagined.
