Chantelle launched her business, Cosmic Chantelle, last year. In the face of the pandemic with collective loss and upheaval, she felt that people needed some spiritual healing more than ever. As a Spiritual Transformation Coach, Chantelle helps women heal, repair, and rebuild the relationship they have with themselves. She believes that this is the crux of much of where women feel stuck and unable to meet or maintain sustainable external changes. Chantelle has featured in the Times and is currently offering intimate 1:1 coaching for women across the globe.
Tell us more about what your spiritual coaching entails?
So I work with women who are finding themselves in a perpetual cycle of self-loathing, self-destructive habits, low self-worth, as well as cycles of depression and anxiety. This is by no means an exhaustive or exclusive list, but mainly women come to me when they feel nothing else is working. Initially, they seem despondent and a bit disheartened, but as we go through the four stages of my 1:1 coaching, they start to really blossom. It’s a joy to witness.
What are the four stages of your 1:1 coaching?
The first stage is awareness, where we really look at their self-talk, what their habits are, what their relationships are like (romantic and friendships), their beliefs about themselves and the world. The second stage is called excavation, and the reason I chose that name is because I feel like this stage really calls for the women I’m working with to dig deep and leaving no stone unturned. It requires a level of honesty and willingness from them to look head-on at potentially very painful past experiences, habits or beliefs. I assure them that I am in that place with them, and metaphorically I’m holding their hand. Through my own excavation, I wholeheartedly believe that this stage is vital for us to see sustainable changes in the way we love and care for ourselves. The third stage is repairing. This is where we start to implement conscious change and really cultivate a rich inner landscape. The final stage is where we rebuild, where we start to really make conscious decisions on the way we treat ourselves, the way we set boundaries, how we love ourselves, and how we uphold our worth. It is finally stepping into the Sovereign Woman and refusing to play small.
Who is the Sovereign Woman?
As Layla Saad writes, "There she is, that Sovereign Woman. She with a courageous heart and a wild soul. She is who says, "This is me. This is who I am."
As women, we are taught to be inviting, pretty and demure from a young age. Most women I work with struggle to break out of this box, afraid to upset the status quo, afraid to put boundaries in case it upsets someone else, afraid to speak their truth in case they are ridiculed, afraid they will be rejected if they put on weight or if they don’t have the perfect credit score. But when we start to deconstruct the lies we are told, to shatter the fragile glass boxes we are in, we begin to see the real treasures underneath. This is where the real gold is. This is where we will find our Sovereign Woman.
What underpins your coaching style?
As an accredited Life Coach, I’m trained in NLP, Hypnotherapy, and EFT. I also hold a certificate in Counselling and am working on a Spiritual Counselling diploma at the moment. However, I would say what underpins my coaching style is spirituality and using it as a tool for healing. I focus heavily on the inner world and repairing that and strengthening faith in the universe, higher power, angels, or whatever you would like to call it. This has been earth-shattering in my own life and continues to hold me steady when things may get rough externally. This is what I offer to the women I work with: a faith that stays with them for life. It’s priceless.
What do you feel are the key steps to surviving uncertainty, especially in the recent year we have experienced?
I really believe that 5 key steps can help when faced with uncertainty that can help ground us and keep us anchored in times like these. I think number 1, acknowledge where you are, and you can do this through the power of journaling and regularly checking in with yourself and how you’re feeling. The biggest tool for me is connecting with my breath, and from there, I can gauge how I am feeling in that moment. The second would be looking at your self-care routine and whether it even exists, plus what it entails at the moment. The third is looking at your perspective and appreciating you are part of a bigger collective. This helps us zoom out on our specific problems and appreciate that others are going through tough times at the moment as well. It also illustrates the idea that we are part of one Source, and so we are all connected, i.e., what you do and say matters. The fourth is future-orientated, reflecting on the changes 2020 brought to your life and perhaps the lifestyle changes you want to incorporate in the future. Finally, it is about becoming more mindful about what we consume in TV, social media, reading, and news. No matter how unaffected we think we are by the media, I can guarantee that in some way, it influences how we feel about ourselves. It is about getting more conscious of what we consume.
How can we start the journey to become more spiritually aware?
1. Practice gratitude: Gratitude lists, gratitude journals, gratitude circles. Whatever floats your boat, just do it.
2. Take time to pray: Praying is the biggest thing I have in my life. It grounds me when I’m feeling low and keeps me connected when I’m going through my day.
3. Change your diet: Feeding myself with sugar and junk food gives me an initial rush, and then I inevitably crash. When I’m practicing nourishing myself with healthy foods, the occasional treat, I instantly feel much more like myself.
4. Watch your time: Notice who you are spending your time with and who you’re around a lot. Do you spend too much scrolling social media (hey, I’ve been there) or swiping on Tinder (also been there)? These activities all leave me empty and irritated when I realize I’ve wasted an hour. Spend your time wisely.
5. Make time for rest: I love a daily nap. I don’t always get the daily nap, but it is a real treat when I do. When I meditate in the morning, I ask myself how I’m feeling, and if that day I feel a little vulnerable and exhausted, I take extra care of myself. Try not to chain yourself to your enormous to-do list (guilty) and make sure you’re listening to your body.
6. Keep it simple: This is a recovery motto, but I think it can apply so much in our life. My calendar is packed, with freelancing, launching my own business, friends, and family obligations! I used to have no boundaries and say yes to everything. Now I ask for space. I whittle things down, take time out, and minimize my interaction with things that leave me feeling drained and low (daytime TV, anyone?) If something or someone is bringing your vibe down, notice it, and make the conscious decision to move away from it.
7. Meditation: This is a big one for connecting to your heart and soul and the biggest one for the beginning of spiritual enlightenment. Meditation keeps me sane, keeps me afloat & keeps me grounded. Guided ones are amazing. Sometimes just rain music helps me connect.
Remember, this isn’t about achieving a perfect life of zen but recognizing that things that come our way are invitations to learn and grow. We use the above practices as our trusted toolbox and our safety nets as we forge ahead, creating a life we love, a life we show up in, despite its challenges.
Finally, what advice would you give to readers who are feeling a bit lost at the moment?
I would say recognize where you are and try to be fully compassionate and kind to yourself in that place. There is no point in chastising yourself or beating yourself up over things, especially your feelings. Once we embrace them, we can fully express them and begin to heal them. I would also say try and find your joy in that day. Whether that is a cup of coffee, fresh flowers, or a walk-in nature, think about your joy and chase it. It is a feeling that will keep you going in these turbulent times.