Written by: Nicky Espinosa, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Life has punched me in the gut a few times. You know those moments when the air is sucked out of the room, and you feel your knees start to buckle? Like the phone call that I got one normal afternoon at work from an emergency room nurse. “She's going to be ok” was the first thing she said to me before she told me my daughter was in the hospital.
Or the text from my son telling me he had overdosed on sleeping medications and needed help.
I can vividly recall little details about each moment. Exactly where I was, the smell of the air, the sensations that crawled across my skin.
I remember the fluorescent light in the room when the nurse called. It made the moment feel more isolating. I remember the smell of cologne from the colleague who was sitting next to me when I got that text. It still makes me nauseous.
When I recall these moments, I can feel the pain again. It’s less intense, scarred over by necessity, but it’s still there. It will always be there.
Someone recently told me that I’ve “really lived.” It wasn’t an observation of my world travels; it was a recognition that I’ve been through some shit.
But haven’t we all?
So why do some people seem chewed up and spit out by life while others flourish?
You can argue that some people just have better support than others.
Or resources.
Or stronger will.
But I don’t think that’s it.
I think it’s about the choice you make in the gut punch moment.
Do you succumb to the moment and punch back?
Do you lash out at those around you in an attempt to regain your footing?
Or do you pause.
I have always chosen to pause.
The emotions are powerful in these experiences.
It’s understandable to lose yourself for a minute, or a day, or a week.
But then you have a choice.
You can let the raw emotions of the circumstance wash you out to a sea of suffering or you can choose to honor them and move forward.
The choice is right there in front of you and it’s yours and yours alone.
Every time life has hit me in the gut I’ve felt it deeply.
But rather than lash out at the nurse or throw divorce papers at my husband, I chose to pause.
I took the time I needed to feel my emotions.
I centered myself first.
So that even in those terrible moments I could be grateful.
Grateful that my daughter was with amazing nurses who were helping her.
Grateful that my son woke up.
Grateful that I’m still standing.
Even in the darkness of life, there is light.
If you pause to see it.
Life is a series of experiences.
The good, the bad, and the terrifying experiences.
You can’t hide from it.
But you can choose.
Choose to pause.
Choose to honor your emotions.
Choose to move forward, trusting that things will unfold exactly the way they are meant to.
Choose to find the good in the bad.
These choices matter.
Do you choose to live a rough life, barely getting through it?
Or do you choose to live a blessed life even when it’s hard?
I choose blessed.
What do you choose?
Nicky Espinosa, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Nicky Espinosa is a leadership expert and executive coach specializing in supporting women executives to reach their full potential. She is a former healthcare executive, author, and professional speaker with 20+ years of senior leadership experience. She is on a mission to close the gender gap in the C-suite by empowering women to confidently level the playing field.
