Written by Janet Henson, Coach
Janet Henson is a globally sought-after Divorce and Narcissist Recovery Coach, dedicated to guiding men and women through one of life’s most traumatic emotional events - divorce. Janet also specializes in helping victims of narcissist abuse recover from their toxic relationship.
A goal is a dream with a deadline – Divorce shatters many dreams, but you will and can realize new dreams. Two great quotes inspired this article:-
‘A goal is a dream with a deadline’ – Napoleon Hill
‘Do not just dream .. have a specific deadline tagged to it … A dream with a clear deadline is a goal.’ - Monish Bhalla
We all have dreams. But dreams are just dreams unless you turn them into reality. If you are divorcing, breaking up or have divorced, you probably have had many dreams shattered. So now is the time to dream again. Dreams are not just by definition a bit out there in the realm of impossibility. Life is all about fulfilling our dreams.
After a break up it is often the case that you spend too much time thinking about the past, going over things in your mind, ‘what ifs’, ‘if only’, This is the hamster wheel that you tend to get stuck in. Remember, the past is the past, and if you live there, you will never move on. You are causing yourself mental anguish and triggering bad memories. The emotional baggage of a former relationship means that it can be difficult to stop living in the past. Relationships can have a pull on us long after they’re over. It can be difficult to accept that something that was once a really big part of your life is now becoming a memory. What’s done is done, and begin to look forward to what might be coming next.
When you come to terms with the end of a relationship is a very freeing experience. It means you’re no longer fighting to keep things alive or struggling to understand what happened. This gives you a new outlook, a freedom that will allow you to make plans for your future. So, you can start dreaming of what that future might look like.
So, come on - start dreaming!
Here are some suggestions your dreams might focus on:-
What is most important to you now?
If you could create your life any way you wanted, what would it look like?
Where would you like to be with your life in 6 months? In a year?
Where would you like to live?
Do you want to find another partner? What would that dream partner be?
Do you want to have a better lifestyle? What lifestyle would you like?
What new skills would you like to learn? Would you like to start a business?
You make your own list or add to this one, DREAM ON. Dream big too, as life is too short for mediocrity!
However, dreaming without action is just that – dreaming.
This quote sums this up:-
‘A goal is a dream with a deadline. Do not just dream .. have a specific deadline tagged to it … A dream with a clear deadline is a goal.‘ - Monish Bhalla
In order to make your dreams come true, you need to attach a deadline to each dream and make it a goal. Setting goals is the bridge to move your dreams to fruition. You should take each dream and break it down into manageable parts with each part having a deadline. This way you will achieve your dreams.
Dream Big. Set Goals. Realize your dreams.
Janet Henson is globally sought-after Divorce Coach, dedicated to guide men and women through one of life’s most traumatic emotional events - divorce. Janet's quest is to banish the stigma that still surrounds divorce and prove that the end of a marriage can be the empowering, life changing and affirming event ever to happened to you. Her coaching experience coupled with her own divorce experience enables her to develop coaching programmes designed to help individuals transform their lives by taking control of their minds and equipping them with the strategies and tools they need in order to successfully deal with this major life event. Enabling them to navigate and cope with their journey with positivity and to confidently transitioning into the next phase of their life. Janet specialises in divorces involving narcissistic abuse, high conflict, divorce in later life and expat divorces.
