Written by: Belynder Walia, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
In management, there's often a fine line between overconfidence and narcissism. If someone you know is in a position of authority, you might well recognise the signs of ego and overconfidence. But there's a difference between the pride someone takes in their work and how they expect others to work. If the ego is getting the best of the person you work with, it can wreak havoc on your team and prevent you from working with or even being an effective leader yourself. Narcissists are not true leaders as they often focus on themselves, leaving their employees feeling like they aren't even in the room.
Working with a narcissistic boss?
How do you know if you're working with a narcissistic boss? First of all, what makes a narcissist boss? A narcissist is an arrogant, self-centred person whose behaviour stems from not accepting their true self. Narcissists use their employees for personal gain and become very angry when others don't do what they want or need. Here are NINE signs to watch out for.
1. Employees treated like puppets
They consider employees as puppets who should always follow their commands without question. They may say things such as, "I want you to do this because I told you to," as if it is a valid reason to obey an order, regardless of differing opinions or legitimate reasons not to.
2. Have to be the centre of attention
The limelight must always shine on them. They take other people's credit. It doesn't matter if someone else has done something great; whether it's a staff member or another employee from another department in the company, they'll still want the attention to go back their way.
3. Always have to be right
This characteristic is the reason for most arguments in life, but narcissists take this to the extreme. If anyone dares to contradict what they say, a narcissist will get defensive and aggressive immediately. Sometimes they may even get angry if someone proves that they are wrong about something, even if it's just a minor topic.
4. Constantly compare themselves
While it's always beneficial to learn from other leaders and try to understand what makes them successful, comparing ourselves with others is dangerous territory. Narcissists who are constantly looking outward to see how their performance stacks up against others will only become less confident in who they are as a leader—and that's not good for anyone.
5. They often use the word "I"
In many cases, narcissists are very self-absorbed people who believe they know everything and that their opinions matter more than those around them. If you hear them saying "I" all the time when speaking with colleagues—while rarely using phrases like "we" or "our team"—that is a self-centred and self-gaining phrase.
6. No respect or boundaries
Narcissists don't like having boundaries set on them, so they tend to ignore those of others. They may also overlook privacy rights when you have something they want, such as information about sensitive topics. If you're working for someone who constantly barges into your office or cubicle unannounced or asks questions that are none of their business, your boss might be a narcissist.
7. Take credit from others
This is another sign that the boss doesn't value other people's contributions. If they could see how bad this makes them look, they would stop doing it. But narcissists often won't see how their behaviour affects others, and they'll keep doing what works best for them — taking credit when they can get away with it.
8. Act like the smartest person
A narcissist is often described as someone who thinks they're smarter than everyone else, but it's not that simple. In reality, a narcissist isn't confident in their intelligence — they have an inferiority complex and have trouble accepting others' opinions when they don't align with their own.
9. Cannot accept constructive criticism
If someone points out something that needs to change, it's hard not to take it personally. It's easy to see how a boss could take that as an attack on their abilities or knowledge. Still, it's crucial when others bring up problems in the workplace to listen and consider what they're saying instead of shutting down any criticism before it has time to land.
Ultimately, any person can be a boss with narcissistic qualities. However, there are certain discernible traits to look out for and specific actions that these types of bosses sometimes take. The above list offers a few examples of such patterns, but this is by no means exhaustive—it is essential to know that even two of the warning signs mentioned above could indicate disturbing behaviour on a narcissistic level. Look out for an upcoming post on 'Living With a Narcissist – 9 Signs You Should Ignore'.
Belynder Walia, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Belynder Walia is a leading Psychotherapist, helping people who need a swift, effective solution to a current problem that negatively impacts their lives. She's worked with a wide variety of people, from stay-at-home carers to experts and celebrities in the public eye. Having suffered Perinatal Anxiety, she focused on enabling others to learn, heal and grow from pain. Belynder is the founder of Serene Lifestyles, an online psychotherapy practice at www.serenelifestyles.com. Her ground-breaking methods include a combination of Psychotherapy and Neuroplasticity to help rewire the THREE Brains (the head, the heart, and the gut). She has been featured in many publications, including Forbes, Cosmopolitan, Harpers Bazaar, The Moment, Planet Mindful, Thrive Global, and The London Economic. Belynder is also writing her first non-fiction book, lessons on Anxiety, providing quick fixes to help people radically change their minds so that they can change their life.
