Written by: Hamsah Smadi, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
A few months ago I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia after years of suffering from chronic pain and a wide array of symptoms starting from muscle pain all over my body, headaches, numbness, heart racing, and many others. I remember when the doctor asked me after I told him about my health history: what are you afraid of? I smiled and said: Nothing at all. I am not afraid of being sick I just want to understand what's going on with me so I can deal with it.
When three doctors confirmed my diagnosis it felt like a moment of clarity.. Finally I got to know what's wrong with me, and I know now what I can and can not do about it.
Having a busy life for too long with so many goals and following an ambitious life approach without enough rest for your mind and body can cause a lot of stress and make your body release more adrenaline and cortisol which make your body in a state of alarm all the time even at your sleep. I learned this fact too late, but still helped a lot in managing my emotions and pain
Years ago when I started learning about positivity and how to heal from negative emotions and experiences, I persisted to learn more about the science of happiness. It helped me to understand that showing yourself understanding, self-compassion, acceptance, and love makes a big difference on emotional and physical levels.
So, from what I learned and practiced with myself and clients during coaching sessions here are 9 tips to deal with your chronic pain:
1. Accept: Acceptance is a valuable state which produces feelings of serenity and peace inside. By accepting the fact that life is not supposed to be all beautiful with amazing memories, joy, and chill, and you are part of humanity where everyone faces their own struggles and hardships.
This is part of living life and an important learning opportunity which will help you learn more about yourself and others, as well as gaining new skills and wisdom.
2. Be kind: to yourself and practice compassion. As Dr. Kristin Neff mentioned in her book:” Self Compassion”, it is important to treat yourself kindly just like you treat your best friend or someone you really love. By overcoming self-hatred and feelings of inadequacy, and by stop trying to be a perfectionist in whatever you do. Nobody is perfect and the same goes for you too.
One self-compassion exercise that you can try is writing a letter to yourself explaining all the challenges and tiredness you have faced. Then as a good friend would do show compassion and love to yourself, give a kind pat on your shoulder and say nice things to your wounded self.
3. Indulge yourself in positive emotions. Based on the work of Dr. Barbara Frederickson in her book "positivity" she explains that experiencing more positive emotions build emotional resources which can support you in time of hardships and open new horizons before your heart and eyes. You can have more positive emotions by doing activities that bring you: joy, interest, serenity, awe, love.
Trying a new hobby, going for a simple walk, or meeting people you enjoy their company are just a few examples of what you can do to induce positive emotions.
4. Use your strengths when getting through tough times. In positive psychology, we talk about strengths within you rather than weaknesses. Identifying your top strengths and using them in the right balance to beat moments of self-doubt, depression and face life challenges would aid you with lots of power and self-confidence. Strengths such as: patience, perseverance, hope, love, and zest can give you the needed boost to be more optimistic and really enjoy life with all its ups and downs.
Learn more about your strengths by doing a simple test on the following link:
5. Practicing yoga, stretching, walking and swimming are amongst the most recommended by doctors for Fibromyalgia patients but also should be practiced moderately as too much exercise may be received by the neuro system as stress and thus causing more pain and stiffness.
6. Pray and enjoy the beautiful unseen part of life. Spirituality is one of the powerful strengths which brings a person feelings of peace and calmness by realizing that you are part of a bigger universe and turning to your creator through praying and meditation. Research shows having some kind of faith, prayer or meditation makes people calmer and relaxed, thus reducing negative emotions like anxiety, fear, and pain.
7. Circle yourself with support from family and friends. Having a positive support system of family, friends, and colleagues one's wellbeing and emotional state as positive psychology research shows.
8. Rest when you are tired or in pain. Chronic pain can be bearable at one day and unbearable at other days. When pain and tiredness are over your limit, take good rest in a quiet room. It is crucial to not feel guilty for it, do whatever makes you comfortable and more rested. You can compensate for delayed tasks on other days when you have more energy.
9. Know the triggers: triggers are stimulus that causes your pain to level up such as stressful conversations, too much work, poor sleep, too little exercise.. whatever triggers your sensitive neuro system to overreact try to avoid them as much as you can.
Above all, remind yourself of all the blessings and good things that happened to you and still happening. Gratitude proved to be one of the greatest coping strategies and a crucial positive emotion that boosts optimism, hope and helps to manage moments of hopelessness.
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Hamsah Smadi, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Hamsah Smadi, is a certified positive psychology coach, who holds an MBA in Marketing and has worked as a university lecturer for several years. She has been always interested in studying human behavior and has given many workshops on positive psychology topics and coached dozens of people through individual coaching sessions, helping them identify their strengths and how to use them in the right balance to: achieve their goals, cope with difficulties, overcome obstacles and achieve their life goals.
As a loving mother of three active kids and a survival of Fibromyalgia, she coaches mothers - especially with chronic illnesses such as Fibromyalgia - and help them manage parenting stress and feelings of guilt and inadequacy by focusing on strength points rather than weaknesses and turning motherhood into a more enjoyable role.
She has a published book titled: A Black Hole: The Journey of Self-Exploration from Chaos to Awakening in Arabic. In which she put the most important tools of positive psychology and ways to use them to improve life and achieve well-being.
