Written by Lark Ericson, Confidence Coach, RN, CHT
Lark Ericson is on a mission to help shy and socially awkward people embrace their authentic selves and confidently navigate any social situation without fear of rejection or embarrassment. Lark understands that dating and networking can be daunting for those who aren't naturally outgoing or confident.
![Executive Contributor Lark Ericson](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/341119_7b7ddddeae884c0e93cda0a93c49bc76~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_980,h_129,al_c,q_85,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01,enc_auto/341119_7b7ddddeae884c0e93cda0a93c49bc76~mv2.png)
As adults, we expect to experience a certain amount of frustration and challenges, but sometimes it seems like we’re putting out multiple fires left and right, and just when you think things are settling down, life throws you a curveball.
![a woman lying at the bed](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/341119_9b01abe09b8349eabceea2a621c507ef~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_884,h_574,al_c,q_85,enc_auto/341119_9b01abe09b8349eabceea2a621c507ef~mv2.jpg)
This has been a rough few months for me. I’ve been struggling with my business, my friendships, my health, and my family, not to mention the added stress of politics, climate change, inflation, and, oh yeah, is A.I. going to destroy us all?
I have had enough. I'm so exhausted and overwhelmed; I just want to scream, "Enough already!" and lie in bed for the next couple of years, or at least until after the apocalypse.
It’s so easy to be consumed with all of the negativity that we lose sight of all of the good that exists in the world too. We get so bogged down in our own crap that we forget other people are dealing with similar and often times worse issues.
I know that's the case for me, anyway.
If you've been feeling stressed, overwhelmed, and struggling with life's curveballs, I'd like to share with you the little life rafts of wisdom that keep me and my sanity afloat.
1. When you’ve been working on something for a long time and it’s just not coming together
a. When you’re beating your head against a wall, there comes a point when you can only see the wall. Take a step back and notice all of the doors that are open to you.
2. When you’re stuck in a pattern of negative thoughts or repeating unhealthy situations
a. Be open to decide.
b. I love this one because it’s not saying “stay positive." It just means that you can be open to deciding your thoughts and actions at every moment. Sometimes life sucks and you want to be a cranky jerk and that’s okay. The magic is in being open. Can you allow yourself just that much space to imagine letting the goodness in?
3. When you're feeling frustrated or angry and nothing seems to be going your way
a. This, too, shall pass.
b. How many awful things have happened to you that are now faded memories? How many awful things have happened to you that now you don’t even remember? One of the greatest gifts of being human is our adaptability. We adapt, and then we forget that there was ever something we even needed to adapt to.
These thought exercises help get me through times of struggle, but of course, there are lots of activities that can lighten our load. Here are a few I enjoy:
Exercise boosts your endorphins and can burn off a lot of negativity. It can also break down the walls you’ve been holding up, so if it’s needed, let yourself cry during a workout. I have certainly cried at the gym a few times!
Volunteering does wonders for you, too. Not only do you get to help other people but volunteering can also help you see your situation in a new light. Happiness increases when we share it!
Spend time doing what you love. Don’t try to make it mean more than that. Don’t try to turn your hobby into a side hustle. Just do something you love because you love it, and let that be enough. And please don’t judge yourself for what you love.
And one last nugget…
1. Gratitude has the power to change your attitude (and your life)
a. While it can be used for getting through hard times, “this, too, shall pass” is also very useful for the good times.
b. One day, everything that brings us joy, everything we cherish, and everyone we love will vanish. Treasure everyone and everything because you don’t know when the end is coming.
I sincerely hope that some of these ideas will help you if you're struggling and have had enough. Life has been tough on all of us to varying degrees, so don’t lose sight of what’s going right for you. Don’t underestimate the small ways you can help other people. And please treat yourself kindly, because this, too, shall pass.
If you want to gain more confidence and success in your life, relationships, or career, schedule your free appointment to work with Lark one-on-one today.
Lark Ericson, Confidence Coach, RN, CHT
Lark Ericson is on a mission to help shy and socially awkward people embrace their authentic selves and confidently navigate any social situation without fear of rejection or embarrassment. Lark understands that dating and networking can be daunting for those who aren't naturally outgoing or confident. Having once avoided socializing due to her own fear of rejection, Lark learned to embrace her "weirdness" and thrive in social settings, achieving success in both love and business. Now known for her confidence and ability to easily initiate conversations, Lark wants to teach others how to ignite their own socializing superpowers.
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