Loredana Regep, MD, CPQC is a seasoned medical professional with over 20 years of global leadership experience in the biotech industry, now focused on coaching and consulting. She specializes in leadership, healthcare, mental fitness and spirituality, helping people thrive mentally, physically and spiritually and live fulfilling lives.
Have you noticed how most resolutions fade by February, leaving us frustrated and self-critical? This cycle of setting and abandoning resolutions has become so common that some have started questioning the effectiveness of this annual ritual. Yet we do not have the courage to let it go; everybody does it.
Let's explore why these well-intentioned commitments often dissolve and, more importantly, what we can do differently.
1. They come from "should" instead of "want"
Many of us set goals based on external expectations or societal pressure rather than genuine desires. We pledge to lose weight because society values certain body types or aim for a promotion because that's what success supposedly looks like. However, lasting transformation can only emerge from authentic internal motivation. When our goals align with our values and desires, we're naturally more committed to achieving them.
2. They focus on "doing" before "being"
Traditional resolutions typically center on specific actions or behaviors without addressing the underlying mindset and self-image that drive our choices. Trying to change our actions without shifting our identity rarely leads to sustainable results. Fundamental transformation flows from who we become, not what we choose to do. When we focus first on evolving our self-perception, aligned actions follow naturally.
3. They originate from lack, not abundance
Most resolutions stem from the belief that we are not good enough. This deficit-based thinking creates unconscious resistance to change as we tell ourselves we're broken and need fixing. When we operate from self-criticism, we activate stress responses that make sustainable change more difficult. Approaching growth from a foundation of self-acceptance and abundance creates a more supportive environment for transformation.
4. They ignore our neural wiring
Willpower alone cannot override years of mental programming. Our brains have developed specific neural pathways through repeated thoughts and behaviors. Lasting change requires more than determination; it needs a conscious rewiring of these pathways through consistent awareness and new thinking patterns. Understanding this neurological aspect helps us approach change more strategically and sustainably.
5. They're too rigid
Life flows, and circumstances change, but traditional resolutions often involve inflexible rules. This rigidity sets us up for failure when inevitable life changes occur. Real growth happens when we align with our inner wisdom (the Sage) and adapt our approach as needed rather than adhering to fixed rules that may no longer serve us.
6. They lack emotional connection
Goals without heart investment become mere items on a to-do list. True transformation happens when we connect deeply with our purpose and emotional "why." When we understand and feel the emotional significance of our desired changes, we're more likely to stay committed even when challenges arise.
7. They overlook self-love
Perhaps most crucially, traditional resolution-setting often reinforces the belief that we must fix ourselves to be worthy. This approach can perpetuate negative self-perception and sabotage our efforts. True change blossoms from accepting and nurturing our whole selves, including our imperfections.
A different approach
Neuroscience and behavioral psychology offer valuable insights into sustainable change. Research shows that our brains continue to form new neural connections throughout our lives and that lasting transformation occurs when we combine consistent practice with emotional engagement.
Here's how to create lasting change supported by science
Start with self-empathy rather than self-criticism. Begin your journey from a place of wholeness, not brokenness. This new perspective creates an optimal state for growth and learning.
Explore who you want to become rather than what you want to achieve. Focus on identity-level change rather than just outcome-based goals. Change becomes more natural when we align our actions with our desired identity.
Create flexible intentions that can evolve with your circumstances. Allow your goals to adapt while maintaining their core purpose. Rigid rules often break, but flexible principles bend and grow.
Connect with your deeper purpose and values. Engage emotionally with your goals. When we understand our "why," we maintain momentum through challenges.
Develop small, sustainable practices that support long-term growth. Build small, consistent actions that compound over time, and celebrate every step in the right direction. Sustainable change happens gradually, not overnight.
Build awareness of your thought patterns. Regular self-reflection helps us make conscious choices rather than react to old patterns.
Cultivate self-compassion throughout your journey. Treat yourself with kindness during the process. Self-compassion creates resilience and supports long-term success.
This approach creates an environment where transformation can emerge naturally and sustainably, aligning with our neurological wiring and need for emotional connection.
At the beginning of 2025, consider this an invitation to step away from what is simply trendy and revolutionize your approach to personal growth. Instead of making another list of resolutions that may fade by February, imagine what might emerge if you approached change from a place of self-empathy and conscious awareness.
Begin by asking yourself: "What would be possible in my life if I approached change from a place of unconditional self-love and abundance instead of 'not (good) enough?'" Your answer is the first step toward lasting transformation.
Are you ready to start this journey? Let’s do it together. Here’s to self-love and abundance in 2025!
Read more from Loredana Regep
Loredana Regep, MD, Coach, Mentor, and Consultant
Loredana Regep, MD, CPQC is a multifaceted professional with over two decades of global leadership experience in the biotech industry. A certified Positive Intelligence Coach, Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, and Coach for Innovators, she now focuses on innovative approaches to personal and organizational transformation. Her expertise spans healthcare, digital health innovation, strategic leadership, mental fitness and spirituality.
She now works with leaders, parents and teenagers in a holistic (body, mind and spirit) manner to build resilience, unlock performance, improve relationships and nurture wellbeing. Through her support, clients gain clarity when making important life decisions, reclaim their authentic selves and peace of mind.
