Written by Jayne Robinson, Spiritual Coach & Advisor
Jayne Robinson is a skilled, intuitive spiritual advisor and coach. Director of JR Coaching, Founder of the Good Initiative, and soon-to-be-published author (2025, NYC Times Square)
Material success might promise happiness and fulfillment, but does it deliver? If you’ve achieved everything you set out to and still feel empty inside, you’re not alone. Many successful entrepreneurs feel as though they’ve “made it,” yet they find themselves disconnected, unfulfilled, and, frankly, miserable.
This often happens when you define your self-worth through external accomplishments. It’s easy to get caught in what I call the “golden handcuffs,” a life that looks fine on the surface but lacks true joy and purpose.
One of the hardest things to do is let go. As humans, we’re wired to avoid loss, even when what we’re clinging to no longer serves us. Eckhart Tolle said it best: “When you become comfortable with uncertainty, infinite possibilities open up.” But stepping into the unknown often feels terrifying. Letting go requires confronting fears of losing something familiar, a business, a relationship, or even your identity.
This fear can keep you stuck in a “semi-okay” life for far too long. As Wayne Dyer wisely put it, “You’ll see it when you believe it.” To move forward, you must first face the truth of your current dissatisfaction.
The illusion of success
Maybe this sounds familiar: you chased your dream, worked tirelessly, and achieved everything you thought would bring fulfillment. Yet, instead of joy, you feel hollow. How did this happen?
As Louise Hay reminds us, “You’ve been criticizing yourself for years, and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” Often, the emptiness you feel isn’t due to a lack of purpose but rather self-neglect. When your worth is tied to external achievements, you lose touch with who you truly are.
This realization can feel like the rug being pulled out from under you. However, as Eckhart Tolle teaches, “The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it.” It’s not about giving up your ambition; it’s about recognizing that success is hollow when it comes at the expense of your inner self.
The deeper truth
The golden handcuffs are more than a physical reality; they’re a mindset. They’re the stories you tell yourself about what matters and who you are. Abraham Hicks offers a perspective shift: “The better you feel, the more in alignment you are.”
True fulfillment doesn’t come from what you achieve; it comes from how aligned you feel with your values and passions. This isn’t about walking away from everything you’ve built; it’s about finding balance so that success doesn’t come at the cost of your relationships, health, or happiness.
6 tips to reignite purpose and find balance
1. Accept your reality
Stop trying to deny what is right in front of you. The longer you ignore how you really feel (i.e., bored, empty, unfulfilled, out of love, etc.), the longer you prolong what is waiting in the wings for you, and the more out of alignment you become with your soul's calling and what you truly desire to create in this one life we have.
2.. Rediscover your core values
Take time to reflect on what truly matters to you. Journaling, meditation, or working with a coach can help uncover these truths. Deepak Chopra’s insight resonates here: “In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside you.” A great way to do this is through journaling. Why Journaling? In an interview with Tim Ferriss, Josh Waitzkin (the number 1 Entrepreneurial Coach) talked about how important it is to visualize, understand, connect with, strategize for, optimize, and understand your future self. Your journal is the tool through which you do this. Journaling is how you persuade yourself of your own desires. You can use your journal to commit yourself to doing what you want to do. You can use your journal to desire and have the future you want. You can journal about anything, but these 5 questions are how you “set the stage” before writing anything else so that you can have optimal results.” Starting with the very first question, “Where am I right now?” This is a surefire way to get you clear and focused.
3. Create space for new passions
Let go of the need to always produce. Explore hobbies or interests you’ve set aside. Make room for joy and curiosity. A great way to do this is to start with the things you enjoy by making a list of 20 things you enjoy most. Then, carve out some time to spend on those. It could spark a renewed sense of energy and new ideas or take you in a totally different direction. After all, where you got to today didn’t happen in one foul swoop, it was made up of millions of tiny choices, each one directing and redirecting you on your path.
4. Prioritize relationships
Connection is at the heart of a meaningful life. Strengthen bonds with loved ones and seek out new communities that inspire you. Wayne Dyer’s words echo here: “Only by giving are you able to receive more than you already have.” If you don’t find the people in your life satisfying your needs and desires, then make it a priority to usher in new kinds. You can’t open a door to the new when the old is standing in front, blocking it. Sometimes, that means letting go of the relationships that aren’t feeding you, at least for the meantime.
5. Practice gratitude daily
Gratitude shifts focus from lack to abundance. It rewires the brain to notice joy in the present moment. Start with simple practices like listing three things you’re grateful for each day, or simply choose one! But I really feel it. Gratitude shifts focus from lack to abundance. It rewires the brain to notice joy in the present moment. Start with simple practices like listing three things you’re grateful for each day. When we disconnect from the head and move into the body to truly feel the emotion of gratitude, it creates profound physical changes. Gratitude has the power to shift our energy by fostering emotions that inspire movement and action. As Dr. Joe Dispenza explains, “Energy and emotion go hand in hand; when you change your energy, you change your life.” By embracing the feeling of gratitude deeply, we align ourselves with the momentum of positive action, propelling us toward our desires.
6. Remember that progress is what makes humans truly happy
Not necessarily achieving but taking a step forward, however small. There is no point in wallowing in self-pity or victim mode for life, not being how you’d like it. So get real with yourself, face your demons and dark truths, and own it. Then decide what it is you want instead and what you can do to start moving, even if slowly in that direction. Learning that we are the creators of our own lives has been one of the most truly liberating and, at the same time, scary AF discoveries I have made. It gives us the choice to choose differently, and it also means that if we don’t, no one else will do it for us, and we will get what we get.
My journey to alignment
For years, I defined my worth by my accomplishments. I worked tirelessly, believing success would fill the void I felt inside from heartbreak. Instead, I hit a breaking point. Burnout, health struggles, and a profound sense of disconnection forced me to confront the truth: I had built my golden handcuffs.
Through my spiritual awakening, I began shedding outdated beliefs. I stopped viewing vulnerability as a weakness and embraced it as a strength. By surrendering control (I am still working on this one every day; it’s a legit process, FYI!) and reconnecting with my inner self, I found clarity and a path to a higher purpose.
Today, I help others navigate their own transformations. If you’re feeling stuck, remember this: Breaking free from the golden handcuffs isn’t about abandoning what you’ve built. It’s about realigning with your values, reigniting your passions, and rediscovering who you are at your core and, from there, rebuilding the life you dream of, incorporating a newfound sense of balance. The life you seek is already within you, waiting to be uncovered.
Are you eager to find out how to build that new life that is waiting for you? Reach out for a 30-minute complimentary discovery call here.
Read more from Jayne Robinson
Jayne Robinson, Spiritual Coach & Advisor
Jayne Robinson is an intuitive spiritual advisor and coach. As the Director of JR Coaching and an avid student of life, Jayne is much like the phoenix rising, leaning into her edge of personal development, emerging from her own transformations and spiritual quests time and time again. As such she is dedicated to helping clients do the same, to create a vibrant new chapter in their lives. Supporting successful entrepreneurs and individuals searching for more to move beyond boredom and burnout, guiding them through a spiritual voyage of uncertainty and fear to a transformative metaphorical death to rebirth. Her mission: embrace discomfort, uncover hidden possibilities, and transform your life.
