5 Steps to Healing Generational Patterns of Burnout and Self-Sacrifice
- Brainz Magazine
- Mar 30
- 6 min read
Updated: Apr 1
Jasmine is an exceptional Trauma-informed Emotional Eating Holistic Health and Wellness Coach who gracefully manages her roles as a dedicated mother, wife, and leader in various church ministries. Her journey is marked by notable accomplishments, such as co-authoring two Amazon number 1 Best-Selling books and attaining the esteemed title of a number 1 International best-seller.
Every family carries an unspoken inheritance, a legacy of beliefs about body, worth, and nourishment that quietly shapes your deepest understanding of yourself. These aren't just words but powerful narratives that travel through generations, carrying the weight of unspoken anxieties, cultural expectations, and survival mechanisms that have silently defined how women view their bodies and health.
From childhood, you absorb complex messages: a grandmother's loving meal preparation tinged with weight concerns, media images presenting impossible beauty standards, and church gatherings where food becomes both celebration and judgment. These experiences create an intricate tapestry of beliefs about what it means to be a woman, to care for yourself, and to honor the body God created.
You've built a successful career as a professional, launched and grown your entrepreneurial venture, or dedicated yourself to church leadership. You're a faithful steward in your community. You take care of your family, support your friends, and excel in multiple domains. By all external measures, you're thriving, so why does your relationship with your body, food, and overall health still feel so fraught with tension?
The answer lies in those deeply ingrained patterns you've carried since childhood. When you find yourself unable to pause despite exhaustion, whether you're managing a team, running your business, or serving in ministry, your body might be remembering the strength of generations of women who kept going when rest wasn't an option. When food becomes both comfort and a source of complex feelings, you're participating in a relationship with nourishment that has deep roots in your family story.
These aren't character flaws or spiritual failings. They're survival mechanisms that once served your lineage but may now be preventing you from experiencing the abundant health God intends for you.
In many families and faith communities, conversations about body image, food relationships, and emotional health remain in the shadows, considered too private or not spiritual enough. With loving intentions, you may have been encouraged to simply be strong, to persevere, to "take it to the Lord in prayer" rather than seeking understanding and community support.
This well-meaning silence may have left you feeling alone in your journey. It might have whispered that you're the only one navigating these waters, that everyone else has found perfect peace while you're still seeking your way. But this couldn't be further from the truth.
Transformation begins by bringing these patterns into the light
This isn't about blaming your mother, grandmother, or community. They passed down what they themselves inherited, often doing their best with the knowledge and resources available.
Instead, this is about awareness and intentional change. Just as the Israelites had to shed their slave mentality after leaving Egypt, you may need to shed inherited beliefs about your body, worth, and health that no longer serve God's purpose for your life.
This journey begins with acknowledgment:
Recognize the messages you've received about food, body, and self-care.
Understand how these messages influence your daily choices.
Honor the strength in your lineage while choosing new patterns.
Embrace what Scripture truly says about your worth and body as God's temple.
Scripture tells us, "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full" (John 10:10). This abundant life encompasses your physical well-being, emotional health, and relationship with the body God gave you.
Healing begins when you recognize that caring for yourself isn't selfish. It's sacred stewardship. It continues as you learn to distinguish between cultural expectations and divine truth about your body. It deepens as you create new patterns around rest, nourishment, and self-compassion.
Practical steps toward liberation
Sacred Examination: Pray and reflect on your earliest memories around food, body image, and health. This isn't just about remembering; it's about understanding how these memories have shaped your current relationship with your body. Create space for honest reflection, allowing God to illuminate the hidden patterns that have governed your self-perception. Consider keeping a journal to track these insights, giving yourself permission to explore without judgment.
Truth-telling community
Find safe sisters in faith with whom you can speak honestly about these struggles. Vulnerability is the pathway to healing, no matter if you're a corporate leader, business owner, or ministry professional. No woman is meant to walk this journey alone. Seek out a small group or trusted friend who can provide not just sympathy but spiritual accountability and genuine support. Look for women who will listen with compassion and help you reframe your narrative from shame to grace.
Boundary setting
Lovingly establish boundaries around conversations about weight, appearance, and food choices. Recognize that setting boundaries is an act of self-respect and spiritual maturity, whether you're in a boardroom, leading a ministry team, or managing your entrepreneurial venture. This might mean gently redirecting family conversations, declining unsolicited comments about your body, or creating healthy distance from relationships that consistently undermine your worth. Remember, boundaries are not walls; they're loving gates that protect your spiritual and emotional well-being.
Intentional nourishment
Approach food as both a divine gift and functional medicine. Move beyond diet culture's restrictive mindset and view nourishment holistically, as physical, emotional, and spiritual sustenance. Learn to listen to your body's true hunger and fullness cues, understanding that food is meant to bring life and energy, not generate guilt or anxiety. Whether you're fueling up for a business meeting, ministry work, or a day of professional challenges, explore nutrition that honors both your physical health and your spiritual understanding of God's design for your body.
Rest as resistance
Choose rest as a spiritual discipline in a world that expects endless availability from women in leadership. Understand that Sabbath is not a luxury but a sacred command that speaks to your inherent worth beyond productivity. Create intentional rhythms that allow for genuine restoration, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. This might mean saying no to commitments that drain you, prioritizing sleep, or creating daily moments of stillness and reconnection with God, regardless of your professional context.
As you transform these generational patterns, remember you're not just healing yourself. You're creating a new legacy for women who will come after you, whether daughters, nieces, mentees, or young women in your community.
Every time you choose compassion over criticism, prioritize true health over appearance, and speak honestly about your journey, you're laying stepping stones to freedom.
Remember, beloved sister, you were never meant to carry these burdens alone. The God who formed you with divine intention walks with you toward wholeness. Your body is not a project to perfect; it’s a sacred vessel reflecting God's glory in the world.
The time for surface-level living is over. Embrace the full, vibrant health that is your divine inheritance, and make way for countless women to follow in your healing footsteps.
Jasmine Kelly-Stephens, IIN Holistic Health and Wellness Coach
Jasmine is an exceptional Trauma-informed Emotional Eating Holistic Health and Wellness Coach who gracefully manages her roles as a dedicated mother, wife, and leader in various church ministries. Her journey is marked by notable accomplishments, such as co-authoring two Amazon Number 1 Best-Selling books and attaining the esteemed title of a Number 1 International best-seller.
Jasmine's personal story spans several decades, interwoven with the trials of comfort, stress, and emotional eating. This deeply personal struggle propels her unwavering commitment to addressing the emotional eating crisis, and guiding women towards healing, restoration, and liberation. At the heart of her mission is the empowerment of women, helping them liberate themselves from the chains of shame and guilt linked to emotional eating, all while drawing on her expertise in trauma-informed care. Through this transformative process, women rediscover their relationship with food and their bodies, embracing a journey of self-love and acceptance that brings forth renewed energy, freedom, and confidence to fulfill their divine callings within the Kingdom.
Jasmine firmly believes that the healing experienced by women extends its positive ripples outward, fostering healthier relationships within families and communities. This ripple effect creates a transformative impact for everyone involved. While Jasmine offers personalized coaching tailored for Christian women entrepreneurs, her passion knows no bounds. Actively spreading the message of transformation through speaking engagements and workshops, she aims to reach anyone open to the journey toward healing and well-being.
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