Written by Rudo Tsvakai Maritsa, Director
Rudo Maritsa is the heart and soul behind Everlight Stories a service dedicated to preserving memories of your deceased loved ones ensuring each narrative is a true reflection of your loved one legacy. Rudo is a speaker on issues related to navigating grief bringing message of hope and healing through preserving memories.
Feeling overwhelmed and heavy laden with grief? You are not alone. Grief, in its many forms, can feel like an insurmountable burden, leaving us lost in the weight of loss and heartache. Whether it comes from the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, or another profound change, grief can shake the foundation of our lives. Yet, amid this pain, reflecting on the life and memories of those we've lost can offer a sense of peace, healing, and even hope. By honouring their legacy and keeping their stories alive, we can find solace and strength to carry on. Here are 5 strategies to help you navigate and carry the burden of grief.
1. Acknowledge your emotions
The first step in navigating grief is to allow yourself to feel the full range of emotions that come with it. Suppressing your feelings can prolong the grieving process and make it more difficult to heal. Whether you feel sadness, anger, guilt, or even relief, it’s I important to acknowledge these emotions as a natural response to loss.
Emotional awareness
Emotional awareness is the ability to recognize and understand your feelings in the moment. Emotional awareness plays a critical role in personal healing and growth, as it enables you to process emotions instead of suppressing or ignoring them. When you acknowledge your emotions, whether positive or negative, you give yourself the opportunity to address underlying issues, which is essential for emotional and mental health. As I became more emotionally aware, I gained insight into how my feelings were influencing my thoughts, behaviours, and how I reacted to my surroundings and people around me. Having emotional awareness helps you to respond, rather than react impulsively, in challenging situations. Emotional awareness fosters self-compassion, while you learn to accept your feelings without judgment, creating a space for healing to occur. In the journey toward personal growth, understanding your emotional landscape provides clarity, allowing you to identify areas where change is needed. It leads to greater emotional intelligence, improved relationships, and resilience. Ultimately, embracing the power of emotional awareness can transform how you relate to yourself and others, guiding you toward deeper personal growth and inner peace.
Towards mental well-being
In the pursuit of mental well-being, the first and most essential step is learning to embrace your emotions. Many people fall into the habit of suppressing or ignoring their feelings, particularly when they are uncomfortable or painful. However, emotions— whether positive or negative—are a natural part of the human experience. They carry valuable information about our internal state, our relationships, and our needs. Ignoring or denying them can lead to emotional bottling, which often manifests as stress, anxiety, or even depression. Embracing your emotions is about giving yourself permission to feel, whether it’s joy, sorrow, anger, or fear without judgement. Each emotion has a purpose and embracing them allows you to connect with your inner self on a deeper level. Instead of seeing emotions as obstacles to be overcome, you can begin to see them as important signals that guide you toward a healthier emotional state.
When you embrace emotions like sadness or frustration, you are no longer running from them. This can reduce the mental burden of constantly trying to suppress feelings. It also gives you the opportunity to understand why you're feeling a certain way. For example, sadness may point to an unmet need or a deep sense of loss, while anger might highlight boundary that has been crossed. Embracing these emotions allows you to respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively, which is crucial for mental well- being. Embracing your emotions doesn’t mean letting them control you; it means acknowledging them, understanding their origin, and choosing how to respond. This skill is central to maintaining mental balance, as it helps prevent emotional overwhelm while also ensuring that you do not ignore or neglect important feelings. Over time, this practice builds resilience, allowing you to navigate life’s challenges with greater ease and emotional strength.
Embracing emotions also cultivates greater self-awareness and mindfulness. It allows you to be present with your feelings in real time, rather than avoiding them or distracting yourself. This mindfulness helps you stay grounded and more connected to your mental state, enabling you to address issues as they arise. The more in tune you become with your emotions, the more you’ll be able to understand what you need to support your mental well-being—whether that’s rest, connection, setting boundaries, or seeking professional help. Ultimately, embracing your emotions empowers you to live more authentically. It helps you break free from the societal expectation of constant positivity and the pressure to always appear "strong." Instead, it allows you to embrace your full range of emotions, and in doing so, fosters emotional health, resilience, and a greater sense of peace. Taking this first step—embracing your emotions—is a powerful act of self-care and is foundational to achieving long-term mental well-being.
2. Faith
In moments of deep grief, faith is often a source of comfort for many and becomes a pillar to lean on providing comfort to the bereaved knowing death is not the end. Faith is not only a source of comfort but a source of hope softening the sting of loss by anticipating reunion and eternal peace.
Strength through loss and sorrow
In times of grief, faith often serves as a crucial source of strength, providing comfort and hope when the pain of loss feels overwhelming. Faith becomes a framework through which individuals can process their emotions, find meaning in their suffering, and draw on spiritual resources to help them heal. Whether it’s through prayer, meditation or reading holy scriptures, faith can be an anchor during the most difficult times of sorrow. One of the key roles of faith in healing is its ability to offer hope for something beyond the present pain. Faith also provides a sense of community, connecting people with others who share similar beliefs. This communal support can be invaluable during grief, offering a network of emotional and spiritual backing. The presence of others who understand your faith journey helps reduce feelings of isolation that often accompany loss, allowing you to grieve in an environment where your pain is acknowledged and shared. Faith encourages surrendering to a higher power, which can help individuals find peace amid uncertainty. During loss, the struggle for control and understanding can be exhausting, but faith allows individuals to trust in a greater plan. This surrender can be freeing, as it lifts the burden of trying to make sense of everything and encourages acceptance of the things we cannot change.
Faith provides a spiritual foundation that reassures individuals they have the strength to endure and the support of a higher power guiding them through the darkness of sorrow. Ultimately, the role of faith in healing goes beyond the immediate comfort it provides. It offers a lasting source of strength and a path toward inner peace, helping individuals navigate their grief with the assurance that they are not alone, and that there is a greater purpose at play and a greater power walking besides them each moment even in the face of loss.
3. Find meaning in your loss
Grief can leave anyone feeling disoriented, confused, empty, and searching for answers. In these moments, finding meaning in your loss can be a powerful way to navigate the pain and confusion. While it may not lessen the immediate sorrow, discovering a sense of purpose through the experience of loss can provide emotional healing and a pathway forward. Finding meaning doesn’t mean that the loss becomes easy or that you simply "move on." Instead, it involves reflecting on the significance of the person you’ve lost and how their life, and even their passing, can influence your own. It might involve honouring their memory in a way that resonates with their values or carrying forward their legacy in your daily life. For some, this could mean taking on a charitable cause that was important to their loved one or embracing certain lessons they left behind.
Grief often prompts deeper self-reflection, allowing you to reassess what matters most in life. Through this process, you may find a new perspective on your relationships, your priorities, and your own life’s purpose. Loss can help bring clarity about what truly holds value—love, connection, kindness, or faith. As difficult as it may seem, grief can serve as a turning point, leading to personal growth and a renewed sense of meaning in your own life. Another way to find meaning is through storytelling. By sharing the life and memories of your loved one with others, you create a lasting impact on the world.
Whether through written stories, creating memory books, or simply talking about their influence, storytelling can be a powerful tool to help you find meaning. It allows you to preserve their legacy while also processing your own emotions in a reflective and purposeful way.
Additionally, loss often brings a new awareness of life’s fragility. This heightened awareness can lead to a deeper appreciation for the time we have and the relationships we hold dear. It may inspire you to live more intentionally, to pursue goals or dreams that were once set aside, or to strengthen the connections you have with those still around you. This newfound appreciation can bring a sense of purpose and help transform the pain of loss into a motivation for living a more meaningful and fulfilled life.
Ultimately, finding meaning in your loss is about transforming your grief into something that can guide and inspire you. It’s not about forgetting or minimising the pain but about embracing it and allowing it to shape a new path forward—one filled with deeper understanding, gratitude, and purpose.
4. Time to grieve
Grief doesn’t have a set timeline, and it’s important to give yourself the time and space you need to process your emotions. Being patient with yourself and avoiding putting pressure on yourself to “move on” or “get over it” quickly is crucial in the healing journey. Healing from grief is a gradual process, and it’s okay to take things one day at a time.
Patience in grieving
Grief is not a linear process, and there’s no set timeline for healing. It’s important to be patient with yourself and allow your emotions to unfold naturally. Everyone’s experience with loss is unique, and comparing your progress to others can lead to frustration or feelings of inadequacy. Instead, recognise that healing from grief is a deeply personal journey, one that may take months, years or even decades.
During this time, it's essential to let yourself experience the full range of emotions without judgment. Some days, you may feel overwhelmed with sorrow; other days, you might feel more at peace. Both are natural parts of the grieving process. By giving yourself the time and space to grieve at your own pace, you create room for true healing. Rushing through grief or avoiding it can lead to unresolved emotions that resurface later. Be kind to yourself during this time and remember that it’s okay to feel exactly how you feel.
Balancing grief and daily life
Finding a balance between processing your loss and maintaining your daily responsibilities is crucial in the healing journey. It can be tempting to either bury yourself in work or withdraw entirely from the world, but both extremes can hinder healing.
Creating intentional space for grief in your life ensures that you honour your feelings of hurt and grief without becoming overwhelmed by them. This might involve setting aside moments in your day for reflection, prayer, or meditation, where you can fully acknowledge your emotions. It is important to reengage with your routine when you feel ready, whether through work, social activities, or hobbies. Balance allows you to grieve without losing connection to your life, ensuring that the process remains gentle and manageable.
5. Deepening appreciation
Lastly, appreciating the person, the time spent together and lessons learnt through reflection brings a sense of gratitude in the midst sorrow. Reflection helps keep their memory alive. By focusing on their life, achievements, and the impact they had on others, you can shift your focus from the pain of their absence to the richness of their presence when they were alive. Reflection often leads to an appreciation of the small moments and gestures that might have gone unnoticed. This sense of gratitude can soften grief, as it brings to mind how much the person enriched your life.
Cultivating gratitude
Deepening appreciation begins with cultivating gratitude for the small, everyday moments that often go unnoticed. In our fast-paced world, it's easy to take life's simple pleasures for granted, whether it's the warmth of the sun on your skin, a quiet morning with a cup of coffee, or the smile of a loved one. By intentionally pausing to acknowledge and savour these moments, you can shift your mindset from one of scarcity or stress to one of abundance and contentment. Gratitude encourages you to focus on what you have rather than what you lack, leading to greater emotional well-being and resilience. This practice can be particularly powerful in difficult times, as it helps you reframe challenges by highlighting the positive aspects of your life. By deepening your appreciation for these small moments, you foster a sense of joy that can sustain you through life's ups and downs.
Honouring relationships
A significant part of deepening appreciation is recognizing and valuing the relationships that shape who you are. Whether it's family, friends, mentors, or even colleagues, the people in your life contribute to your growth, happiness, and sense of belonging. Taking the time to reflect on the impact they have had on your life allows you to not only strengthen your bonds but also deepen your gratitude for their presence. Appreciation can be expressed through simple acts of kindness, meaningful conversations, or gestures of love that honour your connection. By acknowledging the contributions of others in your journey, you cultivate a deeper sense of fulfillment and joy in your relationships. Furthermore, expressing appreciation for those around you can foster a more supportive, connected community. Deepening your appreciation for relationships also reminds you to be present in these moments, allowing you to cherish the time you spend with loved ones and enrich your connections.
Conclusion
Carrying the burden of grief is never easy, but by embracing these strategies, you can navigate your grief journey with grace and resilience. Remember that grief is a deeply personal experience, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. What matters most is finding the path that allows you to heal and honour your loss in a way that feels true to you. Be gentle with yourself, seek support when needed, and allow yourself the time and space to heal. Grief may be a heavy burden, but with faith, patience and self-care, you can find strength to carry it graciously.
Read more from Rudo Tsvakai Maritsa
Rudo Tsvakai Maritsa, Director
Rudo Maritsa transformed her personal loss into a powerful mission to help others preserve the memories of their loved ones through beautifully crafted narrative books. Rudo began her journey after a gut-wrenching experience of losing her 13-year-old son from brain cancer. This profound and life-changing experience ignited a passion in preserving memories helping others find peace and connection in the enduring stories of those who are dear to their hearts. As Director of Everlight stories, Rudo is on a mission to ensure legacies of loved ones continue to inspire and comfort future generations. At Everlight Stories their motto is "lets keep the light of our memories shining bright!"
