Written by Ivy Comota, Personal Coach
Ivy Comota is a certified coach specifically helps high-achieving women and gay men overcome unique challenges in creating more success in all areas of their life.
In a world where high-achieving women strive for better income and impact, it's essential to recognise the power of leading through feminine energy. Particularly in today's fast-paced environment, where life's pressures continually build and the "hustle culture" worships relentless effort, this pursuit can be overwhelming and often leads to burnout. This transformative potential becomes even more vital when experiencing chronic stress and exhaustion, causing deteriorations of both mental and physical health, strained relationships, and diminished overall well-being.
This battle may commonly seen among women, but more so among high-achieving gay men, who are over-functioning in a state of confused, dysfunctional energetic imbalance. This article invites you to embark on a journey to unlock your awareness of energetic balance, and actionable steps to create more fulfilling and sustainable success in all areas of your life.
Understanding the energetic imbalance
Before we explore the steps to create a more fulfilling and sustainable success, it's crucial to understand how the energetic imbalance started.
For far too long, women's inherent creativity and intuition have been systematically suppressed, from conforming to societal expectations in earlier times to the struggle for equal rights during the rise of feminism.
In the "yes dear" era, women were expected to mute their voices and conform to predefined roles, stifling their natural creative instincts. This suppression caused many women to lose touch with their unique gifts, leading to a profound disconnect from their true selves.
While the rise of feminism has undeniably driven significant progress, empowering women to break through societal barriers and achieve unprecedented heights, this journey has not been without its complexities. As women gained more freedom and fought for their rights, the focus often shifted to adopting traditional masculine traits to succeed in a man's world. Although this shift was necessary for progress, it contributed to an imbalance where feminine creativity and intuition were undervalued.
Now, we stand at a critical crossroads. The time has come to reclaim the suppressed creative power within us. This isn't just about personal fulfilment; it's about unlocking a force that can drive meaningful change and innovation. This transformative energy is not merely a catalyst for individual growth but a beacon of progress for all feminine beings striving to break free from historical constraints and create more meaningful success and relationships.
Gaining clarity on your desire
Gaining clarity on your desire is a major first step in your journey towards your uncapped breakthrough. A lot of high- achievers especially, think they know exactly what they want. They know what they have in their life at this point is not working, but often they don't necessarily know where they want to be. A lot of us particularly choose our desire based on what is realistic or based on what we think we should do.
Delving deep into your inner self to uncover what truly ignites your passion and drives you forward. It's more than just setting goals; it's about connecting with your most authentic aspirations. Start by asking yourself probing questions: What are the moments in life that have brought you the most joy? When do you feel the most alive and engaged? Reflect on your answers and look for common themes that reveal your core desires.
It's also important to distinguish between what you want and what you think you should want. Society often imposes its definitions of success, which can cloud your true intentions. Take some time to meditate, journal, or engage in activities that help you tune into your voice. By stripping away external expectations, you get closer to understanding your genuine desires.
Visualization can be a powerful tool in this process. Picture your ideal life in vivid detail. What does your daily routine look like? Who are the people around you? What kind of work are you doing? These visual cues can serve as a roadmap, guiding you towards the steps needed to turn these visions into reality. The clearer your picture, the easier it becomes to align your actions with your desires.
Another effective approach is to listen to your emotions. Emotions can be powerful indicators of what you truly want. Pay attention to the activities and thoughts that elicit strong positive feelings. These emotional responses are often aligned with your core desires and can provide valuable insights into what will bring you fulfilment.
Lastly, share your insights with trusted friends or mentors. Verbalizing your thoughts can offer new perspectives and help solidify your understanding of what you truly want. Remember, gaining clarity is an ongoing process. As you grow and evolve, your desires may shift, and that's perfectly natural. Stay attuned to your inner self and adjust your path as needed.
Understanding and transforming your beliefs
Understanding and transforming your beliefs is a vital step in creating more sustainable success through your feminine energy. Your beliefs shape your perception of the world and influence your actions.
To start, it's essential to examine your existing beliefs about success, relationships, and self-worth. Are there thoughts that limit your potential, like "I'm not good enough" or "Success requires constant struggle"? These limiting beliefs often stem from past experiences, societal conditioning, or fear of failure.
Begin by identifying these beliefs. Reflect on the thoughts that arise when you consider your desires. Are they empowering or do they make you doubt your capabilities? Once you've identified a limiting belief, question its validity. Ask yourself: Is this belief based on facts, or is it a story I've been telling myself?
Recognising that what we create in our life, and what we see in our physical world is a product of our belief system. As Alia Crum noted, our mindset iscentral to health and behaviour, is crucial in this process.
Next, replace these limiting beliefs with empowering ones. For example, transform "I'm not good enough" into "I am worthy of success and happiness." This isn't about blind positivity but about creating a more balanced and realistic perspective that supports your growth. Affirmations can also be a powerful tool in this process. Repeating positive statements about yourself helps to reinforce new, empowering beliefs.
Visualize scenarios where your new beliefs are true. Picture yourself successfully achieving your goals and feeling confident in your worthiness. This mental rehearsal helps to solidify new beliefs and makes them feel more attainable.
Surround yourself with positive influences. Engage with people who uplift you and support your journey. Their encouragement can help reinforce your new beliefs and make it easier to let go of old, limiting ones.
Finally, be patient and compassionate with yourself. Changing deeply ingrained beliefs takes time and effort. Celebrate small victories and remain committed to your transformation. By aligning your beliefs with your desires, you pave the way for success and fulfilment.
Harnessing your energy to create success
Energy plays a significant role in shaping our reality. It's not just about what we believe but also about the energy we emit. We attract experiences that vibrationally match our energy levels. When we show up in the world in that positive vibration, we are going to become a magnet for positive things. Magnetising your desires, may that be wanting to attract success, wanting to attract love, more money, inspiring friends or people into your life. Whatever it is! Whatever amazing things or opportunities you want to attract. Whatever you are attracting is a product of your energy.
To harness your feminine energy, focus on practices that elevate your vibrational state, such as meditation, mindfulness, or engaging in creative pursuits. Embrace activities that rejuvenate your spirit and enhance your emotional well-being. By cultivating a positive energy field, you become a magnet for opportunities and relationships that align with your desires.
Identifying inspired actions
Identifying inspired actions is where clarity, beliefs, and energy converge to propel you toward your desires. Inspired actions are those that feel intuitively right and align with your inner self, rather than actions driven by external pressures or fears.
To identify these actions, start by tuning into your emotions and intuition. Pay attention to the tasks or ideas that spark excitement and joy. These feelings are often indicators that you're on the right path. Break down your desires into smaller, manageable steps. This approach not only makes your goals seem less daunting but also allows you to take meaningful actions that build momentum. For instance, if you desire to start a new career, begin by researching the field, networking with professionals, or taking a relevant course. Each small step brings you closer to your larger goal.
It's essential to remain flexible and open to new opportunities. Sometimes, the path to your desires may take unexpected turns. Be willing to adapt and embrace changes as they come. This openness allows you to recognise and seize opportunities that you might have otherwise overlooked.
Listen to your body and mind. Your physical and emotional well-being can offer valuable insights into which actions are truly inspired. If an activity drains your energy or feels forced, it may not be the right step for you. Conversely, actions that leave you feeling energized and fulfilled are likely aligned with your true desires.
Creating a supportive environment is also crucial. Surround yourself with people who encourage and uplift you. Their positive energy can amplify your own and help you stay motivated. Additionally, seek out resources and tools that support your journey, whether it's books, podcasts, or workshops.
Trust in the process and give yourself permission to take inspired actions without needing to see immediate results. The journey itself is valuable and offers growth and learning opportunities. By focusing on actions that resonate with your feminine energy, you stay aligned with your true self, paving the way for authentic success.
Anchoring to your worthiness
Anchoring to your worthiness involves recognizing and embracing your inherent value without feeling the need to constantly prove yourself. This step requires a shift in mindset from scarcity to abundance, trusting that you are deserving of success, love, and happiness simply by being you. Trusting that things are always working in your favour.
Start by practising self-compassion and treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer a close friend. Acknowledge your achievements, no matter how small, and celebrate them as steps on your journey.
Self-worth also involves setting boundaries and prioritising your own needs. This means saying no to situations and people that drain your energy or don't align with your values. It's not about being selfish; it's about ensuring you have the emotional and physical resources to pursue your goals and maintain your well-being.
Boundaries create a safe space for you to thrive and focus on what truly matters.
Cultivate a sense of gratitude to reinforce your worthiness. Regularly take time to reflect on what you are thankful for, whether it's your skills, relationships, or experiences. Gratitude shifts your focus from what you lack to what you have, fostering a more positive and abundant mindset. This practice can help you see your worth and the abundance already present in your life.
Engaging in activities that align with your passions and values can also anchor you to your worthiness. These activities remind you of your strengths and bring joy, reinforcing the belief that you are valuable and capable. Whether it's a hobby, volunteering, or professional work, doing what you love can significantly boost your sense of self-worth.
Additionally, surround yourself with relationships that uplift and support you. Relationships that foster mutuality and empathy can greatly enhance your sense of worth and empowerment. These relationships act as mirrors, reflecting your value back to you and reminding you of your worth.
Lastly, practice the art of allowing. Trust that you are on the right path and that good things are meant for you. Release the need to control every aspect of your journey and open yourself up to receiving. Allowing means having faith in the process and believing that the universe has abundant opportunities for you. By anchoring to your worthiness, you create a solid foundation for success and happiness, grounded in the understanding that you are enough just as you are.
In a world that often equates success with relentless ambition and cutthroat competition, redefining success through feminine principles offers a refreshing paradigm shift. When you lead from a place of inner knowing, you cultivate a sense of balance and fulfilment that transcends the relentless pursuit of external validation. This shift allows you to create a life that is not only successful but also deeply meaningful and aligned with your true self.
Read more from Ivy Comota
Ivy Comota, Personal Coach
My passion for greater awareness in feminine energy among high-achieving women and gay men, was sparked by my journey overcoming my own struggle to create more success in all areas of my life from a place of ease, joy and fun.
Combining both traditional and innovative techniques, I have created a 5-step process to guide my clients understand their true power, and transform into the life they've always wanted.
I believe, redefining success through feminine energy principles can propel us towards a more authentic, balanced and sustainable success.
