Written by: Imani Missouri, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Employees across the world are fatigued. For employees of color, especially Black professionals, racial battle fatigue and Black fatigue have folks feeling worn out and exiting their jobs in droves seeking a reprieve. Racial trauma in the workplace is looming in the workplace even if there isn’t a racial injustice act in the headlines. I experienced this on the micro (departmental) and macro (national occurrences) levels. And then you’re expected to function as though everything is okay. That’s a false expectation and furthers harm.
To those who may be experiencing this fatigue, fed-upness, and workplace dissatisfaction, what if I told you that it's time for you to forgive?
This is not to minimize the pain or deduce it to one quick fix. But the truth is forgiveness is not for the other person, it is for you. You may be throwing a mini tantrum saying “I don’t wanna” and I overstand that sentiment. The sleepless nights, headaches, ulcers, and drudgery of having to report to “that” person, log on to your email pretending to be unbothered, or report to that building, feels insurmountable. The damage has been done and sometimes it is on repeat. It is not as simple to forget it and move on. Dr. Caroline Leaf says “thoughts are real physical structures we build into our brain with our mind in response to what we experience” and as such, there is a real neurological, physical, emotional, and spiritual response to whatever you’ve experienced.
Here’s some truth on forgiveness:
When you forgive someone you disentangle the person/incident from your head
Forgive because there is a time when you will seek forgiveness and will want it to be accepted
You are given unmerited grace, mercy, and favor each day to get it better than the day before
Forgiveness is not about saying that someone shouldn’t be held accountable for their actions. Forgiveness is about saying that someone else’s actions are not going to define who I am.
Forgiveness has the ability to move you from stuck to unstuck
First, start by forgiving yourself. Tammy Boone notes in her chapter “Forgiveness Gave Me Life” in What’s Your Super Power Anthology, “Self-forgiveness… means that you accept the action, you accept the circumstance and are prepared to move forward without constantly reflecting over occurrences that cannot be changed.” She goes on to say “I discovered the offender to be my ruminating thoughts, which caused me to stay in a place of stuck without moving towards a resolution. As long as I was stuck, I could never walk in nor fulfill my purpose”.
While you sort through how you’ll navigate this environment, I encourage you to reconcile with yourself and your current situation. Here are some guided affirmations:
Forgiveness is connected to my healing
I forgive myself for holding this within and release this burden so that I may heal
I forgive ___for their actions {be specific} just as I was forgiven for {past shortcoming}
I am willing to commit to a lifestyle of healing starting right now
Additional Resources:
Imani Missouri, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Imani Missouri is the Principal Owner of Faith Forward LLC, where she leverages the essence of faith to coach leaders toward their purpose. She has a number of faith-centered sub-brands that motivate women of color to reach their full potential in the professional sphere and beyond. Some of which include the Forward 40 (4tea) podcast, which highlights the experiences of 40 women of color on the rise in the nonprofit and social enterprise sectors. She is also the founder of The Forward Academy, a faith-centered professional development platform for women of color seeking to define themselves beyond their titles. Her career spans experience in the nonprofit, community development, and education sector. She currently serves on the Board of Directors for DIFFvelopment, a nonprofit that creates historically and globally conscious Black visionary leaders who believe in Black business, take responsibility for developing solutions to the issues Black people face, and have unshakeable pride and confidence in themselves. She is also a member of the Medal and Nominating Committees for Smith College.
