Written by: Adele Chee, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Do you sometimes wonder if you really know yourself enough to know what you truly want or need? How can you set the right goals and be fulfilled if you don’t know what you want or need? If you do want to learn about yourself, where do you even begin?
Firstly, in order to learn about yourself, you need to go into the work with the intention of getting to know who you are and not who you want or ought to be.
Here are the 3 ways that I’ve used to learn more about myself and hope you’ll find them useful to learn more about yourself too.
Personal Reflections
When you want to get to know someone, you would reach out to them and have a conversation with them, right? Ergo, if you want to get to know yourself, have a conversation with yourself.
In getting to know someone, you would start with introductions and find out how they are doing. Then, move on to learn more about them.
Ask yourself similar questions to:
Check in with your emotions
What are you feeling now, today, this week, this month?
Be conscious of your thoughts
What matters have been probing or swimming in your mind today, this week, this month?
Identify your priorities
What is important for you to get done or feel right now, tomorrow, next week, next month, or 10 years from now?
Recognise your strengths
What do you do well or have done well today, last week, last month, last year, 10 years ago?
What do others think you do well in?
What significant challenges have you had to overcome?
Discover your passions
What do you love doing?
What content do you relish in consuming ‒ information, music, films, etc?
Who do you enjoy hanging out with?
This is just a thought-starter list and I hope you will expand this list as you develop your self-awareness. One thing I’d add is to include a “why” to all of these questions. In fact, keep asking yourself why until you’ve exhausted your reasons. You may be surprised by what you uncover about yourself through this process.
External Feedback
Being humans, we’re a very social species. Even a recluse will find ways to connect with some form or element of the earth, if not in the shape of another soul. Hence, after seeing yourself through your lens, broaden your peripheral view of yourself through the lens of others. This can help you capture the piece of yourself that may be hidden in your blind spots.
Ask for feedback from your friends, family and colleagues or even strangers. That’s right, strangers. In the social currency world that we live in, we’re being rated for our stays (Airbnb), our purchases (eBay) and our interests and thoughts (social media platforms).
With the people you know, ask the ones whom you can trust to give you an impartial and honest perspective. You can either ask them specific questions about you that you want to get their thoughts on in a conversation, or prepare a questionnaire for them to answer.
The purpose of this approach two-fold:
Get out of your own head – see yourself in another light so as to not cling on to your own biases and make wrong assumptions about yourself.
Observe if there are any common themes and patterns from these comments. This could shed light on some aspects of you, your relationship with various people or deep-seated beliefs that you were not aware of.
Psychometric assessments
An objective way to learn about yourself is to do psychometric assessments. Below are some suggested assessments based on studies done with millions of people across the globe over several decades. Just be mindful that whilst these studies were robust and make these assessments credible, we’re all unique individuals put into our own special circumstances. So, take the results from these assessments with a pinch of salt and use them in combination with the two approaches above.
Personality
Values
Strengths
Before you head off on your self-exploration, I thought it imperative to mention that there may be points in your journey that you may be pleasantly surprised, feel uncomfortable or get upset – but that’s part of the excitement of going on an adventure, right?
With that, I wish you a wonderful time getting to know and understand yourself. May your discoveries lead you to realise what you truly want and need. So that you set the right goals for yourself and find fulfillment when you achieve them.
If you found this article insightful, I would love to hear what resonated with you. Please connect with me on LinkedIn or schedule a FREE call with me to share your thoughts.
For more info on the work that I do, please visit my website!
Adele Chee, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Adele is a transition coach and mentor. Committed to seeing a world filled with thriving individuals living their lives authentically, she is on a mission to empower 1 million people to recognize their true worth and set goals that would truly enrich their lives as well as those around them. For this reason, she has created the S.P.A.R.K.© self-alignment model and program, to help professionals and entrepreneurs around the world leverage their strengths and overcome their fears to transition into having a purpose-driven life.
She believes that having clarity and alignment of one’s values, strengths, vision, and purpose “core elements” oneself is essential in enabling a person to take ownership and be the agent of their own life. This is because when you are certain of who you are and what you want, and they are in alignment, you will live your life authentically as you achieve ambitions that fulfill you.
Her idea of a fulfilling life is to live a life of choice where you can achieve your dreams without succumbing to the pressures of society. Her determination and resilience to experience this life aspiration see her realize her 3 life goals travel the globe, help others lead a better life, and write; alongside her successful 15-year international corporate career prior to starting her own coaching practice during a global pandemic.
