Written by: Meghan Patiño, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Most of us get the message that expertise lives outside of ourselves. We look towards experts, or someone with more experience to have the answers. Often expertise looks pale and male. For Black, Indigenous People of Color, this outward gaze can cause harm by furthering the internalization of oppressive narratives. For people who hold white privilege, this search of the expert outside of ourselves often leads to colluding with an oppressive paradigm that harm others (and ourselves) for the promise of rising to the top.
For more trust, joy, and integrity as we lead, we must keep unlearning the ways we overlook the value we bring from our own life experiences and insight. I continue to find new ways to uproot the ways I undermine myself and my insight. A moment hiking the Kalalau trail was a great teacher for me.
I was five months pregnant with our third baby and my partner and I were taking a trip to Kauai, HI. The trail followed the coastline, enveloping us in tropical forests, expansive views, and lots of mud. We approached a precarious decline in the trail and had two options. My gut told me to take the steeper route that offered some holds where roots stuck out, but I overlooked this moment of insight and I asked my husband which way we should go. He suggested the lower route. It was shorter but it also looked like a sleek slip-and-slide. I took his advice and abruptly landed on my butt as I slid down covered in mud. From watching my go at it, he decided the other route was probably a better option and make it through upright. While I was laughing, I realized my knee-jerk reaction was to ask his opinion over my gut response. his trail illuminated how quickly I undervalued my own insight to navigate my best next step.
I coach people to lead their lives outside of the automatic pattern to look outside of oneself for the “how-to” guide. Instead, I partner with leaders to look within to navigate from a place of self-trust along with savviness to navigate environmental realities. Most of my clients find me when they need to dig deep to trust themselves as they (1) take on new levels of leadership within their organizations, (2) experience a level of success in their professional life and desire to make a more meaningful contribution or (3) are launching a business and experience self-doubt and fear and desire more consistent joy and innovation.
When we build the muscles needed for self-trust, we access our inner sage. Research from Positive Intelligence, a research foundation with the latest breakthroughs in neuroscience and performance science, demonstrates that when we access our inner-sage, we increase our ability to innovate, navigate challenging waters, have empathy for ourselves and others, explore creative options and make decisive actions. We also eliminate unnecessary stress and anxiety. So, let’s welcome the inner sage and experience more joy and success as you lead.
3 Tips To Welcome Your Inner Sage as You Lead
1. Claim Your Essence - Your essence is your natural way of being and when we trust this part of ourselves, we access the powers of our inner sage. Yet, we often aren’t the best at seeing this part of ourselves. Naming your essence is one way to trust the unique brilliance you bring into the world. We can use other people to reflect back to us our essence. To do this, ask a few people trusted people what value you bring to their lives. Receive what they have to say and write it down. They are reflecting back to you your essence. Your essence is like the bright sun. The sun would have no idea how bright and powerful it is unless other objects reflected back its light.
2. Quiet the Inner Critic - We all have an inner-critic that causes us to doubt, stress out and play small. The problem is not that we have an inner-critic (there will always be this voice though we can turn down its volume) it is that we mistake it for being factual and we give it the steering wheel to our lives. A powerful action to take on it to simply name and notice when the inner-critic is taking over. We cannot change what we do not see, so see it and name it when it’s sabotaging you. For more in-depth work to interrupt the inner critic, you can also download my free 21-Day Guide to Interrupting the Inner Critic here.
3. Create Your Signature to Success - Reflect on what your personal definition of success is. When you are 80, what will have really mattered in your life? Without becoming crystal clear here about what you care most about, seeking success can lead to chasing someone else's values. Name what values are most important to you and post it up as a guide to remember what you're committed to creating in your life. It’s a risk to lead anchored within yourself and it may mean some things need to crumble, but know there’s also a phoenix waiting to rise.
For more support to conspire for your joy and success through self-trust, schedule an exploratory call here: https://meghanpatinocoaching.as.me/schedule.php
Want to learn more from Meghan? Follow her on Facebook and Linkedin. You can also visit her website to get in touch.
Meghan Patiño, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Meghan Patiño is a leader in coaching women to trust themselves as they create a positive impact in the world of organizational leadership, business, and community change. Her clients are entrepreneurs, leaders in tech companies, non-profit executives, public servant managers & parents transitioning to work. All her work is dedicated to the journey of belonging to yourself and to boldly revealing the essence of who you are as you lead your life. Inclusion, self-compassion, anti-racism, and integrity are values she leads by. She utilized her Master in Social Work from St. Louis University to design and implement leadership programs for over 10 years before graduating from Accomplishment Coaching, where she was trained in over 200 tools and distinctions to use with individuals and groups to create deep, sustainable shifts. She lives in Seattle with her partner and three kids and is always up for embracing the chaos, beauty, and adventure of life.
