Written by: Alaina Schwartz, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Many people start out the year making New Year’s resolutions or setting goals and intentions to create the changes they want or to reach their goals.
To really improve the quality of your life requires a change from the inside out. Our external environment is always mirroring our internal landscape. When we reprogram old patterns and limiting beliefs, it allows us to create sustainable and lasting changes to our circumstances in every area of our lives and design our lives the way we desire.
Here are 10 things that, if removed from your life, would radically upgrade the feeling, quality and experience of your life:
1. Victimhood - Trigger warning! You might have been victimized by some event (ie. abuse, embezzlement, cheating, etc.). However, whether you remain a victim after any event is a choice.
A person with a victim mentality feels like bad things keep happening TO them and is personally victimized by anything that goes wrong. It may feel as if everyone is against them. People can situationally have a victim mentality – be a victim in a particular situation. Or they can have a general victim mindset about their life. A victim mindset is so ingrained and insidious as it’s been passed down from generation to generation. The truth is that life is always working FOR us, not happening to us. Even if we can’t see how in the moment.
2. Blame - Blame is the belief that what people are experiencing is not their fault. People may make mistakes or poor choices and blame others or circumstances. Most of the time, the person really does believe that what’s happening is caused by someone or something outside of themselves. They then feel powerless over it. The Universal Law of Cause and Effect states that we are always the first cause of the effect of our lives. Taking responsibility for our circumstances takes our power back to then change those circumstances we don’t prefer.
3. Shame and Guilt - Shame is the feeling that there’s something wrong with you. Guilt is the feeling that you did something wrong. They are the two lowest emotions on David Hawkins Map of Consciousness because they vibrate at the lowest end of consciousness. Society, religion, parents, teachers, etc. have learned that shame and guilt are effective behavior control mechanisms. So most of us have experienced shame and guilt with regularity in our childhoods. Some will argue that they are important self-regulating emotions. This is a mind lie. They are always toxic and untrue and once introduced often become self-perpetuating.
4. Excuses - We often make excuses to save face rather than have to deal with uncomfortable conversations or feelings. We may make excuses to avoid feeling judged, because we care what other people think of us and want to be perceived in the best light. Excuses are rationalizations we use to justify behavior that is motivated by the subconscious mind.
Bob Proctor,
“Rationalizations are rationing lies to the mind”
We usually make excuses because we’re afraid to take responsibility for our actions. See number 10 below.
5. Fear - All fear is learned except for the fear of loud noises and the fear of falling – though those are less fear and more startle responses. I want you to let that sink in…all fear is learned!
We are usually projecting our past (which doesn’t exist anymore) onto a future (which doesn’t yet exist) and it’s causing fear. Fear makes sense when you’re being chased by a saber tooth tiger, but has very little place in our current society – unless you’re living in a war zone type of environment. More than 85% of the things we fear never come true.
We’re the only species that we know of that can create fear from our thoughts alone. If you observe a rabbit being chased by a fox, within 20 minutes after the event the rabbit will return to its parasympathetic nervous system and be grazing again. The rabbit doesn’t need therapy for 5 years! (I am not bashing trauma therapy. What I am saying is that societally we’re living in our egos and not in truth the vast majority of the time. We’d respond to stimuli similarly as the rest of nature if we were raised to live in truth.)
6. Negative Self-Talk - The negative inner critic is indicative of our self-limiting beliefs. That inner dialogue limits your ability to believe in yourself and what you’re capable of.
It decreases mental health, motivation, leads to depression and feelings of helplessness, shuts off the ability to see and capitalize on opportunities, creates perfectionism, relationship issues…and the list goes on, though not one is positive. If you wouldn’t let anyone speak to you that way, then don’t speak to yourself that way either. Treat yourself with the same kindness, love and compassion you would a BFF.
7. Toxic People - There are three minute, three hour and three-day people – people you should not spend more than three minutes with, people who you can spend some time with before their energy becomes draining and those people who bolster your energy (3 day people). Remove those who are negative or drain your energy (they’re the 3 minute people) from your life altogether. Make sure you spend more time with people who support and champion you (3-day people). Spend the appropriate time for the type of person you’re with and minimize the time with 3-minute people if you can’t eliminate them completely.
8. Stress & Anxiety - Stress and anxiety are a natural part of the body’s fight, flight or freeze response to real or perceived danger. The issue is that last part “perceived” danger. As stated above, we’re the only species that creates fear from our thoughts alone. Fear, doubt and worry is usually not real and created by our current paradigm and ignorance of truth.
All the rest of nature recovers from stressful and anxious situations usually within 20 minutes (without interference from humans).
Regardless of what country you live in, society has programmed us with such mind lies and those limiting beliefs have been passed down from generation to generation. We are inundated with all of these untruths that we believe are real about ourselves, our reality, life and experiences which create stress and anxiety. It’s unfortunate how many people are experiencing chronic stress and anxiety on the regular.
The truth really does set you free! Sometimes cliches are true…
9. Limiting Beliefs - If limiting beliefs were eliminated, it would pretty much wipe out the other preceding eight on this list and allow greater responsibility to be taken for your life. This is the cornerstone of the mind’s lies. The vast majority of our limiting beliefs were programmed into our subconscious minds before the age of seven, when we had no ability to reject anything we were told about ourselves or life.
A belief is just a thought that was kept on repeat until it solidified into a belief. Limiting beliefs are false beliefs we have about ourselves, our lives, interaction with others, how the world/reality works, etc. They prevent people from pursuing and/or achieving their desires, living a meaningful and fulfilling life full of confidence and purpose. Essentially becoming the greatest version of ourselves and living a life of ease and abundance, which is our birthrights.
There are many ways out there to reprogram our limiting beliefs and rewire our brains (hypnosis, NLP, EFT, Theta Healing, Inner Child Reparenting work, RIM, Gestalt, hire a mindset coach). However, I’ve experienced or learned many of them and there’s only one that I’ve found that does this quickly, permanently and across the board – meaning not only a handful of people experience elimination of their limiting beliefs. It’s the modality that I currently work with now that allows truth to heal the limiting beliefs on a subconscious level.
10. Avoiding taking responsibility - People confuse taking responsibility for their lives with obligation for those things that they’ve previously committed to – expenses, children, other people/relationships, their work, house or car payments, etc. They are not one and the same.
Taking responsibility is synonymous with self-love. It means understanding that you are the cause of the effect of your life and looking internally for the solution to all of your external issues rather than an external fix. All of the other nine things in this list are evidence of NOT taking responsibility for your life.
When you take responsibility for your life, you understand that you create ALL of your thoughts, feelings, and actions. No one and no thing (nothing) can make you feel anything…it’s the meaning you’re giving the thing that makes you feel a certain way. You own your thoughts, feelings and actions and do not blame others or circumstances for them. You learn how not to take things personally, stop complaining and gossiping, become impeccable with your word and realize you alone have the power to make yourself happy.
It’s a big ask, but the rewards are beyond what you can imagine.
When you remove these 10 things or even become committed to removal of these 10 things, you move with the wind in your sails. There’s an effortlessness and ease to creation and life itself. The love for life is magnified. And the Universe conspires to help you realize your purpose and a fuller expression of you. Well worth the effort, don’t you think?!?
If you want to learn more about rewiring your brain to take a quantum leap in your income, manifest effortlessly or to ditch struggle and/or work hard, reach out to me here and let’s chat!
For more info, I invite you to connect with me here on LinkedIn or visit Alaina Schwartz and follow Alaina on Facebook and Instagram.
Here’s a free case study to watch!
Alaina Schwartz, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Alaina Schwartz is the Founder & CEO of Alaina Schwartz Enterprises. She’s a speaker, best-selling author, and Intuitive Mindset Mentor. At 14, Alaina suffered a traumatic brain injury, and her mother was told she’d have permanent brain damage. Her mother retrained Alaina’s brain for a full recovery. Then, after 18 years as an attorney in the music industry and the EVP and Exec Board Member of the largest independent music company globally, she walked away from it all to discover her purpose. Her personal life completely unraveled. She became hyper-focused on building her life purpose and rewiring her brain again for success and fulfillment. She has created a multiple six-figure company and a beautiful life since. As an Intuitive Mindset Coach/Mentor, she uses those experiences and her training as the foundation of her work with entrepreneurs, helping them break through upper limits and clear the blocks that are preventing them from creating 7+ figure businesses with ease. Alaina’s mission is to help people remember who they truly are so they can live their purpose and full potential.
