Dana Silverstein is a clinical therapist providing coaching & counseling services to meet your unique needs. She is the owner and operator of a small town and growing practice called Dana Silverstein, LMSW, PLLC.
The brain has the natural ability to produce thoughts all on its own. With science supporting that humans have up to 40,000 thoughts a day, this can become problematic very quickly. Understanding the difference between our brain and our thoughts is the first step to quieting the mind. Asking our brain to stop thinking would be like asking our heart to stop beating. While we can’t turn off our thoughts, we can learn to manage them by reducing energy and emotion.
1. Separate “1 brain” into “3 minds”
Everyone’s brain has their past, present, and future minds.
2. Recognize the difference
The past mind is comprised of thoughts about events that have already happened. They sound like “Why did I,” “Why didn’t I,” “I should of,” or “I shouldn’t of.” Past mind thoughts often lead to shame, guilt, regret, doubt, and embarrassment.
Our present mind is our mindful thoughts. We know we are here if we are using our 5 senses (sight, touch, taste, smell, and sound). Our present mind can often lead to feelings of calm, grounded and gratitude.
The future mind is made up of thoughts or events that have not yet happened and might never happen. They sound like “what if,” “I need to,” or “should I?” As a result, future mind thoughts typically lead to feelings of anxiety, stress and overwhelmingness.
3. Organize
A lot of my clients find it helpful to imagine having three baskets in their mind labeled “past,” “present,” and “future.” We use this imagery for the next tip below.
4. Notice without action
Most past and future mind thoughts are not helpful or true. Even if a thought is true, it does not necessarily require immediate action or any action at all. The act of simply acknowledging the thought by putting it in its correct “basket” is enough, especially for that moment. Thoughts can simply be just thoughts.
5. Shift back
When you find yourself in the past or future mind, shift back to your present mind/moment using your 5 senses.
Putting it into practice
Example 1
Imagine lying in bed, and all of a sudden, you get a thought about no one laughing at a joke you made at lunch. You may start to feel embarrassed because that’s what our past brain does. When having a past brain thought like this, first recognize it is your past brain. This event already happened, and thinking of this now is not helpful. Next, imagery should be used to place the thought back into the past brain, where it belongs and deserves no more attention. Lastly, use your 5 senses to get back into your present brain, such as noticing the softness of your blanket or details of your bedroom.
Example 2
Imagine you are eating dinner with a friend, and all of a sudden, feeling bogged down with thoughts about a work presentation you don’t have to give until next week. Due to being wrapped up in your thoughts, you missed what your friend was saying, and your thoughts snowballed all the way to losing your job. Recognize this is your future brain. Thinking of this now is not reality, true, or helpful. Place this thought back into the “future basket." Lastly, shift back to your present mind using your 5 senses, such as the sound of your friend’s voice or the taste of your food.
Moral of the story
Stay present!
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Dana Silverstein, Clinical Therapist: Coaching & Counseling
Dana Silverstein, LMSW, is a clinical therapist well known for her eclectic approach and unique techniques to help children, teens, and adults navigate their social-emotional worlds and reach their full potential.
